Hearts are overrated. If they're so great, how come hospitals keep them in those cheap little coolers on wheels? (View Post)

stop projecting your feelings upon my sexy apologist self. (View Post)

In retrospect, it wasn't so hard to prove that they were dopplegangers. I just had to walk into the offices one day and pick up a scroll that complained about foolish humans, carefully outlined the e… (View Post)

It's tough to put on a customs form at the post office, though. (View Post)

Now that it's going to be exactly 14 years, my ritual will be sacrosanct. I must purchase a goat, and anoint the sacred altar with its lifeblood. (View Post)