Really? You want to threaten me with sailors and pirates? I'll let you know I have the most notorious pirate crew of Eora on my side. The Black Isle Bastards are under my command! Mwuahaha!
*As soon as Aedan's sailor warriors hear the name of the dreadful Black Isle Bastards they withdraw in fear. Some even jump off their ship because they'd rather drown that meeting the notorious pirate crew.*
I just received a report that one of my agents found the magpie stash that had the eye gem of Shandaxx. My agent had to disarm several spike traps, but was able to confiscate the gem from the magpie stash. The agent was on the way to a rendezvous point to deliver the gem to me when, unfortunately, he started fighting with another of my agents. In the chaos he dropped the gem and a third agent then took the gem and stashed it. Unfortunately a fourth agent was watching at the time and stole the stashed gem from the third agent. A fifth agent watched the fourth agent stash the gem, but when she went to steal the gem from the stash of the fourth agent, she found out it was a fake stash.
Anyway, long story short, we are still trying to locate the gem. We assume it is in a stash somewhere but we still don't know exactly who stashed it or where it was stashed or even if there were any further agents that raided the gem from each others' stashes. We will get to the bottom of this. Somehow...
I have finally been able to track down the location of the gem! It somehow wound up in a stash on the dwarf planet Ceres (don't ask). I gave my agents orders to transport it to the skull. They estimate that it will be delivered within the day.
Mean time, in a hidden nest up in a tree, a magpie is opening his stash to revel in the beauty of its shiny contents. The agonizing cry when it realizes the jewel has been stolen strikes out in all directions. It's like its soul has been ripped from its body! Who could be so cruel, so malevolant as to STEAL from a tiny, cute little magpie? That jewel belonged to him! He had found it and it belongs to none other than him. Finders keepers is a universal law, more sacred than life itself! No stone shall be left unturned, no stash remain unlooted, no squirrel left untouched, no..
Finally I have my internet back! The city has been working on the road and utilities nearby my house for a while now. Yesterday, which was my birthday, the dolts accidentally cut through the landline for my block which caused me to lose internet and phone service. They must have just fixed the issue within the last hour.