B(G)-Movie: The Challenge!

MilesBeyond

So, as a bit of a companion thread to the Baldur's Gate Movie thread, I thought I'd offer up this interesting idea.

The good news is, you've been contacted to direct a Baldur's Gate movie. You have full creative control over the entire project.

The bad news is, after you sign the contract you are informed that your overall budget for the entire movie is... $5 million.

So how do you work with it? Who will you cast? What will the story be? Will the orcs be played by people in green make-up? Will the solar be a woman in an angel costume dangling from the ceiling? Will you cast your roommate from college as Sarevok?

Will your movie be lost as soon as it released, or will it be the B-movie to end all B-movies, something that your grandchildren will be riffing on in their holographic Youtube 2000 simulator?

You decide! Because in B(G)-Movie, it's all down to you!

Talvrae

well can,t use big names... so i guess i would use tgwtg.com crew to play the roles could be very fun lol

Leaf_Eater

My Cayman Islands account would be receiving a hefty deposit, I would dissapear off the face of the earth and feel sad for the rest of my life at the mistake I made.

bgplaya

$5 million dollars worth of velociraptor CGI

Me as every character...Male or female, monster or human.

Syntia13

Hmmm, let's see...
Actors: Contact film/actor schools and hire promising students to play young characters, and their teachers to play older ones. Contact theaters and hire actors who are actually good at acting rather than 'looking good', and are not spoiled with ?.???.??? checks.
Practical special effects - cheaper and often better looking than CGI. (A can of spray and a lighter can go a long way when casting a 'burning hands' spell :P )
Props - give a shout out to all hobbyists who make/collect medieval weapons. Rent your local theater's prop store for 'reach interiors', and raid a flee market for 'poor interior' props.
Outdoor locations - any wild-looking area near you. Remember, Peter Jackson filmed some scenes of LotR in a PARK in the middle of city.

The biggest problem would be with fantastic creatures (whose anatomy is often different from anything in our world) - like kobolds, wyverns, carrion crawlers, etc - that's where the bulk of the budget would go. Also remember the words of wisdom: 'less can often be more' - the less we see of monsters, the better they seem to look. And : 'shadows are directors best friend' - same as above.
So, let's get to work!

Ward

Odd. I'll answer it anyway.

$5000k is plenty. You don't need hundreds of millions to make a good movie, that's just a myth.

Good movies from the 20th century were on budgets of literally a few thousand. Good movies aren't the budget man.

A few good costumes, some forests (which cost nothing to use), some back drops and noob actors. Costumes would barely need to be designed, most of it could be found in a OP shop (except for Sarevok's armour, paper mashy attack!). The most expensive thing would be professional sound, light, video and copyright lawsuits on your ass. xD

Monty Python and the Holy Grail cost nothing to make (over a million but not 5) but it will be one of the greatest for many decades.

MilesBeyond

Ward said:

Odd. I'll answer it anyway.

$5000k is plenty. You don't need hundreds of millions to make a good movie, that's just a myth.

Good movies from the 20th century were on budgets of literally a few thousand. Good movies aren't the budget man.

A few good costumes, some forests (which cost nothing to use), some back drops and noob actors. Costumes would barely need to be designed, most of it could be found in a OP shop (except for Sarevok's armour, paper mashy attack!). The most expensive thing would be professional sound, light, video and copyright lawsuits on your ass. xD

Monty Python and the Holy Grail cost nothing to make (over a million but not 5) but it will be one of the greatest for many decades.

Inflation, holmes, it's what's for breakfast. MPHG was super low budget (and they spent over half of their money on the Trojan Rabbit), but still a great movie... Only adjusted for today's market, it probably would be pushing $10 million, if not more.

Zafiro

Use those bucks for a new game or a cartoon.

Drugar

Cartoon or other animation is probably the way to go.

Or leave posters at acting schools, allowing people to pay you to be part of the BG experience, increasing the budget and recruiting actors in one blow.

Though personally, I'd blow the money on having Sarevok's armour finely remade, after which I'd ruin the movie and keep the suit.

Delvarian

I have been involved in making films before for a small independent company. 5 mil would be a lot of money to them.
Actors are not hard to get for cheap as they need to have so many hours worked to join SAG.
Special effects would require the largest investment, but even so hiring people recently graduated and just starting out you can get decent effects for a cheap price.
In closing, write me the check and I'll give you a bad ass BG movie.

Cheesebelly

I would kickstart myself some more money. Hopefully someone would be donating the cause a few billion dollars. Then, it would be time for part B of my plan.

Schneidend

Oh nnoooo, not a meager 5 million dollars!

As Cheesebelly pointed out - Kickstarter.

Quasadu

This looks like a job for Dead Gentlemen Productions!