Just wanted to say sorry to everyone at BeamDog, especially Amber Scott [Please Lock Thread]

TheKorenarchy

For some reason I decided to weigh in on the shitstorm yesterday evening and I'm having posters regret. I know you all must be miserable about the attacks your getting, I felt justified to give my two cents since I spent money on the expansion but my anger was unjustified. It's your game and I'm just getting the undeserved privilege of playing it. You all put so much time and effort into bring this game back after 15 years and it was a really stupid and evil move for me to feel any resentment over something so small about it. I haven't even gotten to the expansion content yet and till I felt entitled enough to come express my irritancy that I'd have to deal with feminist politics in my favorite video game from now on.

On that note I want to apologize to Amber Scott the most. You must be trying your best be the most accepting and open person you can possibly be (with Baldur's Gate being more inclusive and all). Even if my posts didn't mention you at all I still had prejudice from past experiences with tactics of some 'Social Justice Warriors' or 'Feminists' that I dehumanized you with. I don't actually disagree with any of the values you were trying to bring to the game, I just feel that as a Straight, White, Male I'm always going to be the 'Other' that your group is fighting.

I really wish there was not resentment to be triggered at the start of this shitstorm. One day I might be at peace with all this Feminist and SJW internet stuff. Probably going to need a lot more time before that happens, but I don't want to be angry at or hate anyone so I'm sure I will eventually.

Again I'm sorry and I hope you can forgive me.

Now If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go cry male tears and play the expansion... I'm sure it will be wonderful and make me feel even more horrible. If I like it I'll leave a positive review.

Son_of_Imoen

Impressive. It takes true strength of character to admit of wrongs and change your stance.

I envy you. I've only discovered the term 'SJW' this weekend, but as someone who strives for justice and equality on a daily basis (in my volunteer's work, in choosing which foods to buy, in supporting LGBT people coming out), I just find myself sticking to my principles and I often wonder about the usefulness of internet discussions as no one seems to divide from their stance despite of all the arguments put forth. Seeing someone change their stance is impressive. If I some day find I'm faulty in something, I hope I have the strength of character to admit it and change my stance, even if changing stance doesn't come easy for someone diagnosed with autistic spectrum disorder.

O_Bruce

I for a change don't think that admitting mistakes is display of true strength of character. I do, however, think that it is necessary for development of invidual. And I can respect that.

TheKorenarchy

Resisting the new progressive movement has been a source of depression for me. I broke away from what mainstream progressives think around 2010. I didn't want the shame that comes from being a straight, white male in the movement. I'm not saying I want to be intolerant to everyone else, I'm just saying I don't want to be abused. I think I need a break from the Internet. That this is such a source of depression for me. Good luck in your future endeavours, time to slink back into the shadows.

Pekingduckman

Assuming that you are sincere and this isn't a satire, I have only one thing to say to you. Real life isn't a video game and does not function on video game logic, greater rights for women, LGBT, and ethnic minorities etc does not take away rights from straight White males, and sometimes, just because you personally don't see something as a problem does not mean that other people see the same way as you do. And this is coming from a straight man of Asian background.

TheKorenarchy

I'm just trying to explain where my hatred came from. I have nothing against inclusion. All my problems with progressivism stemmed from being the enemy of the movement by default. I had a line for how many times I could hear the 'old white men need to die' stuff before it got to me. I was a Progressive Feminist for 3-6 months before rejecting it based on there hatred. Then, because I couldn't seem to avoid the ideology this decade, more and more stories made me hate them.

Last week I saw a video of a white collage kid getting bullied for wearing dreadlocks,

A few weeks before that I watched what appeared to be the entire world misrepresent some douchebag pickup artist and try to turn him into a rapist.

A few months ago I saw people lose their jobs because OTHER people drew turd swastika's in a bathroom in Mizzou.

Before that I saw people on the gamergate side grossly get misrepresented.

Before that some asshole shot up a town in the states and was labeled a 'Men's Right's Activist' for no other reason then to attack feminisms doppelganger.

I can't go back to Progressivism or Feminism. I don't trust them with my well being, I don't trust them with men or masculinity, and I feel that I was their enemy long before the time when I was happy to call myself a Feminist or a Progressive. I feel betrayed by them. All I can do is ignore them. Now when I play Siege of Dragonspear I can't look at Safana, Mizhim or Minsc and not think about the things I hate about 'Social Justice'.

[Deleted User]

The user and all related content has been deleted.

Pekingduckman

Mate, the truth of the matter is, I don't think you should turn your back on progressive movements simply because there are some aggressive bad apples. In my time as a social justice activist, I have ran into some really toxic people, including some radical feminists who told me flat out that they don't want me or other men to get involved with feminism. In pretty much all social justice movements, past and present, you get heavy divisions, but I feel that the causes themselves outweighs the behavior of certain individuals, and I've learned to becomes friends and allies with activists who want to work you.

I also think that the incidents you mentioned are rather minute in terms of the big social picture. For instance, the dreadlocks incident pales in comparison to the systemic racial inequalities which exists in America, such as the numerous deaths in custody and police shooting of Black Americans, including ones for driving with a broken taillight and playing with a toy gun. This is the same for gender issues, and in my country there is still a high statistic for domestic violence, while women's shelters are facing increased funding cuts.

That's not saying that there's no room to discuss the issues you mentioned, and in all social movements there should be venues for self critique. However, I don't think Gamergate as it stands adds anything constructive, and if anything, it already poisoned the well when it comes to dialogues, eg how transpeople should be written in video games, when you get a lynch mob calling for the writer's head.

TheKorenarchy

My downfall was really listening to the other side. When I was a Feminist I liked listening to and laughing at the MRA.... But then some things they said resonated with me. I think both sides are good and human, but both sides just want to eradicate each other.

Progressives shouldn't have to lie about everyone else if they're in the right. The movement that makes me feel ashamed of my existence and also puts pressure on me to hate rather than understand the people I disagree with. It goes against the values that brought me to it in the first place.

Having this post up for the last few days has made me miserable. I don't a Progressive is a bad person, but I also don't think a Conservative is a bad person. I think people that hurt people are bad people. And I was party to the hate mob that probably drove Amber underground - That makes me a bad person.

I have issues with both sides of the Social Justice debate. I think debate was lost a long time ago and it's all devolved into misrepresentation and dehumanization. I want people to listen to opposing viewpoints more often... But at the same time I don't because they might turn into me.

TheKorenarchy

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Sorry for keeping it up past the initial apology. I did have issues I needed to work through and I thank those who helped with that.