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  • swnmcmlxiswnmcmlxi Member Posts: 297
    "Sometimes... sometimes Faerûn can be a kind place...". Or, in this case, the Internet. I'm glad I happened to see this thread. Reality mostly sucks. Like, totally, big time. It does. However, games like BG and the social context they provide are one of the things that help many of us cope. Recalling bygone debates about the destructive power of computer games I wonder how many lives computer games have actually *saved*? Probably quite a few.

    [Deleted User]Son_of_ImoenBrudeBelgarathMTH
  • Son_of_ImoenSon_of_Imoen Member Posts: 1,763
    edited October 2012
    swnmcmlxi said:

    Recalling bygone debates about the destructive power of computer games I wonder how many lives computer games have actually *saved*? Probably quite a few.

    True. For me, there's three reasons I always counter the thought of quiting this life, as something I would love to, but definitely won't do because of:

    - my work for people like me, standing up for their interests, organizing events, writing about their problems, speaking up for them in city council meetings,
    - my familiy and friends, who would miss me dearly,
    (those are the atruistic motives, now the selfish motives):
    - there's still so many games I would like to play. I always have several ideas for new BG parties on the shelf, than there's so many games I haven't yet found the time for, because I've so many BG campaigns still to complete.

    So even though I suffer from all the knowledge of injustices in the world that I'd rather quit, partly because of BG, my life isn't finished yet,

    BrudeBelgarathMTH
  • trinittrinit Member Posts: 677
    @sandmanCCL i saw your thread when you posted it and i really wanted to respond somehow, but i didn't know what to write.since i still feel the need to do so, i will try and share my thoughts.

    realistically, i dont know anything about you besides what you wrote here and there on this forum, so i can't offer any advice. at the same time i never attempted suicide (although i have personality that corresponds with mild manic depression), so i can't claim to understand you (i wouldn't make such presumptions anyhow), or share experience, although i empathize with you as much as that is possible.

    i can try to share what i've learned so far- in my good phases i firmly believe that belief is one of the most powerful tools available to human being. when i say belief, i'm not talking about belief in god, i'm talking in general about taking for granted something we don't really know.
    there is not a force on this planet that can guarantee, you will live for two more seconds, nothing we know about ourselves is absolute truth and all our emotions are trivial and meaningless. i think one look at the earth from space represents a glimpse of how relative, fleeting and devoid of meaning everything is. i find that terrible and beautiful at the same time, it puts existence AND free will in entire new perspective.

    BUT, does any of above lessens our being or should be a valid reason to trivialize everything? of course not, we believe in ideals, ourselves, higher beings, better tomorrow, love, doesn't matter what, but that gives us WILL to persevere, act, and somehow deal with life on our own terms.
    on my bad days, i find it hard to ignore the fact that everything is simply my own construct and i can't count on anything in my life, even myself. but like i said, i don't think such relativisation is appropriate for human beings, if anything else, as long we feel anything we are human.

    fun fact- this is the reason i love planescape game so much. in that game you literally alter reality around yourself with your will (that comes from belief).

    to conclude this messy rant and get to the point- i'm happy for you, happy that you decided to fight on, and find what you need right now in this forum. i'm sure you will/have find it in other places also. i also salute your decision to share this with all the forum.

    BelgarathMTHArveragus
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