Nalia in party or not is not a factor. You can accept or reject the stronghold offer as you desire. Just play the quest and make your decision afterwards. Only for the Nalia romance (added by a mod) you need to accept the stronghold. Otherwise it's up to you.
And besides, why would you want to take in your party someone who constantly complains while fighting monsters that you are helping the less fortunate?
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Only for the Nalia romance (added by a mod) you need to accept the stronghold. Otherwise it's up to you.