Baldur's Gate Summer

Coutelier

More utter silliness. Summer may be gone (it snowed here a couple nights ago), at least in the northern hemisphere, but at least we can still look forward to it again.

Now, if Baldur's Gate were an anime, it would be compulsory for all the characters to go the beach in at least one episode (or the pool, or the hot springs if it's a bit more risque). And so, that's what all the characters did last year, and here are the photos.

And don't worry ladies; there are a few hunky guys for you to oogle at too. Like this one, for example:



Yeah, ladies; check him out. This is what all guys see when we look in the mirror.

Imoen really wishes she hadn't been sneaking around. Now she's off to confirm her sexuality with Aerie.

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Elves like Aerie don't really tan. When summer comes, she spends most of her time in the shade, for fear that her standing in direct sunlight might actually blind someone:



Imoen has a similar problem, but it turns out Wyvern venom makes good sunblock. Don't ask how that was found out, and don't apply too much of it because it can melt your skin:



Jaheira really enjoys the sun, and welcomes the chance to just lay back and relax for a change:

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Viconia... really not a sun worshiper at all:



Rich kids hang out together:



But, when it comes to the most audacious outfit, Safana is never, ever to be outdone:

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I promised some hunks, so here you go:

Classic male model posing; just stand there and pretend to look at something really far away:



Valygar lets his hair down:



Haer'Dalis seems a bit confused...



Aerie: Oh, Haer'Dalis. I-it's... good to see you... would you mind standing back a bit... thanks...

Haer'Dalis: Ah, my mourning dove. See do I that thy cold and lonely heart doth seek out again the warmth that once we shared.

Aerie: Er... w-what are you talking about?

Haer'Dalis: Alas, since we parted ways, this sparrow has flown on to pastures new.

Aerie: That's nice... um, y-you do remember that it was me who dumped you, don't you?

Haer'Dalis: You must seek your warmth elsewhere, my dove.

Aerie: Okay... sure.

Haer'Dalis: Fly on, my dove!

Aerie: I-I'll... try my best.

Haer'Dalis: Forget me!

Aerie: Done.

Haer'Dalis: Yay, although it will seem your heart is shattered, in time it will mend!

Aerie: A-are... are you still here?

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Awww... kids, eh? I remember when I used to have fun like this:



The halflings decide to have words with the young teen, Tenya:

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Keldorn's become a real family man these days... although Imoen doesn't think much of his cooking. Lucky there's a dumb animal around who will scoff up anything... Keldorn bought the family dog along, too:



And there's a couple other arrivals:

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Branwatch:



Not quite Ursula Andress:

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Of course, there's a bit of sport and physical activity... although not really for Shar-Teel:



In the meantime, the guys reenact scenes from the movie Top Gun (which I've never seen; from what I gather, it's aimed exclusively at gay aviation enthusiasts):

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Ladie's Volleyball. Imoen & Aerie team up to challenge Jaheira & Viconia. But Jaheira doesn't really need a partner:



Having taken a hammering, poor Aerie thinks she's let her friend down. But, Immy'll think of a way to cheer her up, later:

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Although overall, Imoen & Aerie aren't the worst off in the little tournament they have. Safana fails to win a single match. Maybe because she didn't come dressed, and maybe because her partner is a bit off putting... and she keeps trying to start a fight with the ball:



However, the final match and the eventual winners are the same every year:



And, as is traditional, the special guest arrives to reward the trophies:



Saf's just looking for a nice, deep, pit to throw that into...

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Later in the day, and everything seemed to be going well. The breeze was cooling, everyone was relaxed, unti... Immy the Pink:



Imoen: Arrrg, that be enough sinnin fer now me'hearties. I see me some landlubbers ahead! 'ave at 'em lassies'o'the seas... show 'em no mercy!

Nalia: Imoen! What in the hells...?!

Imoen: Extra crown fer the one that brings me the'ead of De'Arnise!



Minsc: Boo! You traitor!

Imoen: 'Ey, Teel! Don't you get too far ahead! Leave some fer the rest of us! And Aerie... was that really necessary?

Aerie: 'E were reaching fer a weapon, cap'n!

Imoen: Fair enough...

Tenya: Can I have a sword? Can I?

Imoen: You? Ye think I'm crazy?

Tenya: Awww, c'mon!

Imoen: Be good, n'maybe I'll let ya fire the cannon later, okay?

Scattered in small groups along the beach, the defenders are one by one overrun:



Imoen: Aerie?

Aerie: 'E were reaching fer a weapon, cap'n!

Imoen: Where could he possibly hide any weap... y'know, never mind...

Coran: I just want you ladies to know, I'm ready to go along with any and all of your demands. But, if you feel you need to pull down my pants and spank me for being a naughty boy, you'll find me amenable to that too...

Safana: Do shut up, Coran...

Coran: Oh, but whatever you do, please don't kiss my nipples or allow your silken hairs to trickle down across my chest... I really can't stand that...

Jaheira: Just what is all this noise... oooff!

Coran: I won't press charges!

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Imoen: Reaching fer a weapon, I suppose?

Aerie: No, cap'n... just dinnay like the look of 'im.

Viconia: Very strange custom, this 'vacation'... I wonder why it has to end this way every year...



Nalia: Just stay here... stay quiet... soon this whole thing will blow over...

Imoen: Alright... do the honours, kiddo... fire!

A short time later:

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And so, beware the pink sails of dreaded dread pirate Immy the Pink:



Cap'n Immy Wants You!

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And so, that was how the characters spent last summer. The End.

Tschakong

Very entertaining and absolutely awesome. Good work!

TJ_Hooker

Umm, don't take this the wrong way, but I'm kind of experiencing the uncanny valley effect with a lot of these. But certainly an impressive effort.

And yes, I did just link to tvtropes, and yes I know that makes me a terrible person.

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Tschakong said:

Very entertaining and absolutely awesome. Good work!

Thank you muchly.

TJ_Hooker said:

Umm, don't take this the wrong way, but I'm kind of experiencing the uncanny valley effect with a lot of these. But certainly an impressive effort.

And yes, I did just link to tvtropes, and yes I know that makes me a terrible person.

That's understandable, considering the tools used. Generally, I don't really try for realism, since it is fantasy. I'm not sure whether going for more realistic textures/lighting would decrease or increase the effect... but I try to make it look at least a bit like a painting.

Although I do think I should give Yoshimo and Ajantis some nipples, at least if they're going to be topless again in the future, so they look less like an old GI Joe/Action Man doll. And there's no way Shar-Teel could have kicked like that; I should have twisted her leg a bit so the toes were pointing forward.

Moomintroll

Pirate Imoen + Boo in novelty spectacles is standout amazing.

SirK8

@TJ_Hooker - ah sh*t not again! At least I have somewhere to be in 2 hours, so I'll have a hard stop

TJ_Hooker said:

And yes, I did just link to tvtropes, and yes I know that makes me a terrible person.

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Moomintroll said:

Pirate Imoen + Boo in novelty spectacles is standout amazing.

A pirate captain has gotta have a parrot, right? There weren't any in the store, but they did offer to saw the front legs off a chihuahua and stick some feathers and a beak on it... she passed, and just got a mask for Boo.

Drugar

You had way too much fun making those last few shots.

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Drugar said:

You had way too much fun making those last few shots.

I'm sorry... I tried to be normal, but with Imoen there in the pics... just proved impossible. She's a bad influence. Again, apologies.

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Bhaaldog said:

Captain Imoen is great!

Maybe I'll do more high seas adventures with Immy and her pirate crew (none of whom actually knows anything about sailing a ship, although Tenya makes it a little easier and Aerie's very at home in the crows nest).

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Coutelier

Bhaaldog said:

Coutelier said:

Bhaaldog said:

Captain Imoen is great!

Maybe I'll do more high seas adventures with Immy and her pirate crew (none of whom actually knows anything about sailing a ship, although Tenya makes it a little easier and Aerie's very at home in the crows nest).

That would be fun! Viconia needs a pirate hat too...

Prisoners of the Pink are given a chance to join, so it might be a bigger crew next time.

swnmcmlxi

@Coutelier, when going through this collection, I almost expected Graham Chapman to come walking into the screen dressed as the colonel, saying that this has become too silly. Shar-Teel and the shark also reminded me of Python - she is preparing for the fish slap dance, isn't she? Very silly stuff, lovely!

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swnmcmlxi said:

@Coutelier, when going through this collection, I almost expected Graham Chapman to come walking into the screen dressed as the colonel, saying that this has become too silly. Shar-Teel and the shark also reminded me of Python - she is preparing for the fish slap dance, isn't she? Very silly stuff, lovely!

I love Python. And when I think of Imoen in particular, I think that's the kind of silly, surreal, humor she would really like.

And Monty Python's Flying Circus is of course Aerie's favorite TV show as well.

ShapiroKeatsDarkMage

Awesome pics as always.

SCARY_WIZARD

Coutelier said:

Prisoners of the Pink are given a chance to join, so it might be a bigger crew next time.

What's "Option B"? ?

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ShapiroKeatsDarkMage said:

Awesome pics as always.

Thank you very much.

SCARY_WIZARD said:

Coutelier said:

Prisoners of the Pink are given a chance to join, so it might be a bigger crew next time.

What's "Option B"? ?

Well, she might try to ransom them; but since no-one's likely to want to pay for any of these characters, especially not in chocolate mousse which is what she usually demands, they'll probably end up walking the plank.