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The Tale of Dumbfry Bowguard - (Now as Dragon Diciple)

KidCarnivalKidCarnival Member Posts: 3,747
I decided to play a - possibily documented - lawful stupid run. This includes using all cursed items (dice decides which party member, charname included; reroll if the item can't be used due to class/alignment), drink all potions immediately after finding them, recruiting NPCs that can or will turn hostile on each other, no rep management at all to increase the chance of evil NPCs leaving and paladins/rangers falling and whatever other stupid thing I can come up with. I'll play on normal, no reload/no resurrection, full party.

I was considering a Wizard Slayer as charname, because it's said to be such a useless kit. But it would also prevent me from using magical cursed items, and that's no fun. So please recommend the least useful race/class combo you can think of, with the following requirements:

- at least a remote chance to make it further than Nashkel Mines, so probably a fighter class
- I'll use a 75 roll and likely set INT and WIS as low as I can, so classes with a minimum of 10 or higher aren't first choice (though I'm open to the idea of nerfing that with a certain cursed ring later)
- lawful alignment would be nice for the "lawful stupid" theme, but I don't mind neutral or chaotic
- a really stupid choice of weapon profs/spells/skill distribution is welcome, too

Post edited by KidCarnival on
SCARY_WIZARDIllustair[Deleted User]LemernisFeytor
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Comments

  • agradineagradine Member Posts: 13
    Maybe not lawful but certainly stupid:
    Halfling Barbarian
    Maybe Dagger & Shield, or Crossbow.

  • FlashburnFlashburn Member Posts: 1,726
    That sounds more like Chaotic Stupid to me. Be careful about those tropes man, they'll ruin your life. Set INT and WIS to 3. And do a regular Bard if they don't have an INT requirement; I forget if they do.

  • KidCarnivalKidCarnival Member Posts: 3,747
    I think bards have a INT requirement, but it might be 10, that would be ok. It's not "chaotic stupid" because I roleplay it as a charname who thinks he does the right thing (considers himself lawful good), but simply isn't very good at the whole thinking thing.

  • FardragonFardragon Member Posts: 4,511
    agradine said:

    Maybe not lawful but certainly stupid:
    Halfling Barbarian
    Maybe Dagger & Shield, or Crossbow.

    I'm currently playing a halfing barbarian dual wielding bastard swords.

    Who yer callin stoopid?

  • LemernisLemernis Member, Moderator Posts: 4,264
    I look forward to this! Very creative.

    I once thought to play a Jester as such, envisioning him pretty much like the main character in The Jerk. A silly git, basically. Judgment 6. And true to form he'd do the most foolish things. He'd use all the flip dialogue responses. That was more just for RP value. There'd be the tactical challenge of getting through battles with the least formidable assortment of NPCs. But otherwise it would just be a kind of lighthearted, zany departure from the usual game.

    Your concept here really deepens the gameplay challenge, though. It's a quirky sort of ironman run.

    SCARY_WIZARD
  • KidCarnivalKidCarnival Member Posts: 3,747
    I'd still roleplay it as much as possible. Drinking potions, for example, would be the wrong impression that they make you immune to future dangers - the more "protection from electrical damage" you drink, the less lightning can hurt you later. Charname would not be aware of the limited duration. Same for magical items - as a (probably) fighter class, he doesn't understand magic, he just knows it's powerful. So no matter what it is, if it's magical, it must be good.
    I'll try to keep my NPCs, cursed or not, alive and not try to intentionally kill a mage I just gimped to 3 INT. Charname thinks of himself as a good and heroic person, so sacrificing his comrades isn't something he'd do. (He wouldn't realize they are gimped to begin with...) He's also unaware of alignment, as everyone who offers to join his cause must obviously be a good heroic person, too.

  • Kitteh_On_A_CloudKitteh_On_A_Cloud Member Posts: 1,629
    So, you'd actually be playing a party where Minsc would be the leader, heh. A good guy, but mentally not all too sharp? Great idea. Can't wait to hear about your (mis)adventures. :)

  • KidCarnivalKidCarnival Member Posts: 3,747
    Yeah, that comparison certainly fits. After reading a bit in the "Inquistors vs. Cavaliers" topic, I'm seeing Undead Slayer as an option. There are no very powerful undead enemies in BG1 - no lich, vampire or anything, just skeletons, ghouls and minor creatures that pose no risk to anyone. This makes the kit a rather dumb choice... or am I missing something?

  • KidCarnivalKidCarnival Member Posts: 3,747
    edited February 2013
    I looked the kit up. It has a 13 wisdom requirement, but I could set INT to 3. So the adventure of Dumbfry begins in Candlekeep, where he killed 5 rats and 2 cats so far. Weapon profs are Club, Spear, Flail and Sword&Shield.

    photo Baldr010.png

    I just got through the intro. Dumbfry returned the book, failed to find Firebead's scroll, told Fuller that he needs Hull's sword and returned it to Hull, after drinking the cow antidote. He bought a club, a helm and splint mail and left Candlekeep, but dual wields daggers at the moment. The people who tried to kill him had those, and they are professionals.
    Imoen lead him to the dead body of Gorion, where Dumbfry put on an unidentified belt and gave Imoen a necklace and a leather armor. He then noticed a white potion in her inventory and drank it, which came in very handy when he killed a gibberling.
    Following the road, Dumbfry met two super nice people who gave him a health potion. Reason enough to take them along to Friendly Arm Inn - they may actually know how to get there. Consumed another white potion found in the short guy's backpack. Reached the Friendly Arm without any incidents and spent 100 of 155 gold for identifying the belt. It's magical, and therefore powerful. Dumbfry still wears it.
    A guy in a dress tried to kill Dumbfry after he inquired about his name and point of origin. That Xzar person turned out to be a mage, and must clearly be the most powerful group member so far. Killed the assassin with the help of a guard and Imoen's use of her wand. She knows about magic, so she must be very powerful, too.

    (Now in FAI, talked to Dorn, picked up Khalid and Jaheira, did not talk to Joia, but will go upstairs for the other FAI quests when I continue, then head to Nashkel.)

    Post edited by KidCarnival on
    IllustairKilivitzAristilliusEadwyn_G8keeper
  • Aasimar069Aasimar069 Member Posts: 803
    Your character is certainly stupid, but not lawful for god's sake ;-)

  • Aasimar069Aasimar069 Member Posts: 803
    Your character is certainly stupid, but not lawful for god's sake ;-)

  • IllustairIllustair Member Posts: 817
    This is creative and funny. Please do continue @KidCarnival

  • LemernisLemernis Member, Moderator Posts: 4,264
    edited February 2013
    Int 3 would literally be mentally retarded, and profoundly so. Non-verbal, for example. Just sayin'. Maybe 5 or 6 to conform a little better to what it would actually be "if it were real"?

  • The user and all related content has been deleted.

  • KidCarnivalKidCarnival Member Posts: 3,747
    edited February 2013
    5 or 6 INT might work... Can I reduce charisma below 17? That was the roll, and 13 wis; I took all points I could reduce from INT and put them in str/dex/con, without having a real advantage from any. And of course Dumbfry is lawful - he's a paladin! ;)

  • DelvarianDelvarian Member Posts: 1,232
    Can't get a low Charisma on a paladin. You could make him a fighter who fancies himself a paladin, like a stupid Mazzy.

  • MadhaxMadhax Member Posts: 1,416
    This is hilarious! Not what I was expecting, though. "Lawful Stupid" to me suggests Vhailor from Planescape:Torment. Still, I look forward to updates.

  • KidCarnivalKidCarnival Member Posts: 3,747
    EE:Keeper fixed some of Dumbfry's mental issues. He now has 5 INT and 15 CHA.
    I will also not immediately drink blue health potions because there are too many of them to remain funny. I give most to NPCs, who desperately try to survive the wise choices of their almighty authority figure. Purple health elixirs (the 9 HP/heal + remove poison) will still be consumed immediately.

    Dumbfry was invisible for about 4 seconds after drinking Jaheira's potion and then going upstairs to talk to Unshey, who told him about an ogre. Further upstairs, Dumbfry informed a nobleman about not being the maid, and talked to Landrin.

    When leaving Friendly Arm and searching the ogre, Dumbfry used Detect Evil and was shocked that Montaron and Xzar were highlighted. Obviously, this ability is broken because they are nice people. Killed a dire wolf; Montaron used his health potion. (Every party member had 1 when leaving FAI.) Killed two xvarts, then four gibberlings.

    Found ogre and decided that a morning star must be better than a dagger because whoa, that ogre was mighty! Dumbfry now uses this morning star and dual wields with a club in the offhand. Also, Jaheira is suddenly a man. (Dice distribution of unidentified belt.) Dumbfry was a bit confused when witnessing this change, but figured it was probably neccessary for the magic to work. The other belt didn't do anything. Dumbfry apologized to Unshey for returning a broken belt.

    (Heading for Nashkel/Beregost next.)


    Aristillius
  • KidCarnivalKidCarnival Member Posts: 3,747
    Delvarian said:

    Can't get a low Charisma on a paladin. You could make him a fighter who fancies himself a paladin, like a stupid Mazzy.

    EE:Keeper can, though I would prefer legal stats... 15 is the lowest a bard can go, so I assumed it would be a similar minimum. Might change it back if paladins must have 17, and take the 2 points from dex and con instead.

  • DelvarianDelvarian Member Posts: 1,232
    Legal Charisma on a paladin is 17.

  • the_spyderthe_spyder Member Posts: 5,017
    I guess I am not getting the hang of this thread. I understand that the OP is attempting to put unreasonable restrictions on their play-through. That makes sense to me. What I don't get is the title "Lawful Stupid".

    The restrictions are in no way "Lawful" and seem (to me) wholly stupid. Where is the lawful bent? How is using every cursed item and drinking every potion in any way lawful? How is no rep management in any way lawful? How is having everyone and anyone join the group in any way lawful?

    Pardon my musings. Just asking.

    Flashburn
  • deltagodeltago Member Posts: 6,867
    I feel sorry for two of your party members when you reach the Nashkel mines.

  • KidCarnivalKidCarnival Member Posts: 3,747
    Delvarian said:

    Legal Charisma on a paladin is 17.

    I'll change it back and take 2 points from the first 3 then.

    And it's lawful stupid because it's a charname thinking of himself as a lawful good hero, but being stupid.

  • the_spyderthe_spyder Member Posts: 5,017


    And it's lawful stupid because it's a charname thinking of himself as a lawful good hero, but being stupid.

    I am just funnin with ya, but he could think of himself as chaotic Evil and simply be stupid with the same actions and effects.

    Better to simply say you are playing a INT3 run. It would make more sense.

  • KidCarnivalKidCarnival Member Posts: 3,747
    Why would I do something that makes more sense? :P

  • the_spyderthe_spyder Member Posts: 5,017
    ^^^ Point well taken. Game set and match to you good sir. ::bows::

  • DelvarianDelvarian Member Posts: 1,232
    Dumbfry is still a better CHARNAME than Abdel Adrian...

    KidCarnival
  • agradineagradine Member Posts: 13
    Fardragon said:



    I'm currently playing a halfing barbarian dual wielding bastard swords.

    Who yer callin stoopid?

    Heh, I played a halfling barbarian in pnp once (Eberron) and it was great fun. But there's a great difference between dual-wielding excellent weapons and purposefully limiting your damage output with silly proficiencies.

    Undead Hunter would've by second suggestion. Seems like this going to be a lot of fun.

    Also, this is what I always think of when I hear Lawful Stupid: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/LawfulStupid

  • KidCarnivalKidCarnival Member Posts: 3,747
    edited February 2013
    Dumbfry's stats are fixed to be legal, will post the change later. It's now 13 13 14 5 13 17. I already got no advantage from con, so I took a point from each strength and dex to get charisma back to 17.

    Also, I guess this is a vote because I'm really undecided what to do with this situation:

    Encountering Viconia and Baeloth (should I survive that long). Dumbfry would probably kill both on sight, because he's a paladin and they are drow, and because it's stupid to kill two of the most powerful NPCs. However, if I kill Viconia, I miss out on the option to have her and Kivan fight to death in an inconvenient situation.

    Should NPCs with a cursed item die, I'll use the dice to decide if I pick up the cursed item or leave the entire gear on the ground to disappear. Odd number: Pick everything up, roll to decide who gets it. Even number: Leave everything on ground.

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