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Come one, come all, to Kalesra's House of Fortune!



  • booinyoureyesbooinyoureyes Member Posts: 6,162
    edited February 2014
    lol @Dreyy‌ !!!

    "Nay, good monk, Lady Syf and yourself were clearly meant to be together. Who am I to challenge true love?"

    Ergo thinks frantically... I see two friends of this rogue have gathered close by. I am outnumbered now, and cannot hope to face these three backstabbers AND this loveable misguided oaf... what can I do, what can I do...?


    "I must ask that anyone who oppose this union between lovely lady and mighty monk speak now or forever hold their peace!"

    Ergo slyly steps on Kellem's foot

    "Yaaaaoooo!" the thief cries in pain.

    "You hear this, my potent punchy pugilist friend?" Ergo panics for moment as the thief's two friends approach him, as he makes his way slowly toward the arena "It, uh, sounds like disgraceful dissent from a deceitfu- oh, you know what, forget it.


    Ergo trips one of Kellem's allies, who 'accidently' pummels into Gourd. As the both topple onto the Arena, Ergo swings at Kellem, who catches his fist. As the remaining rogue jumps after his friend and Gord, his leg latches onto Ergo's ornamental cape, sending all three tumblin' after.

    How come nothing can ever be simple...

    Post edited by booinyoureyes on
  • DreyyDreyy Member Posts: 118
    His eyes lighting up with urgency, Gourd scowls and dramaticly points at Kellem, his chin lifted high and an agitated cocked eye beaming with menace at the Thief.

    "HO!? Raggady little man insult honour of I, Gourd!? and even insult good sweet noble pretty ladies beauty!?" the Half-Orc clentches his fists and slams one firmly against his chest.

    "Such foul insult aimed at a noble lady cannot go unpunished! Ho!" Gourd rushes over to Syf @Kalesra and grips her hands firmly in his, a strong look of determination on his face.

    "Ho! Fear not good pretty lady! and do not let tears water your pretty face! For I, Gourd shall give these raggady little men a firm lesson in the Way of the Punchy Fist! Ho!"

    As Gourd continues to make promises of venegence and justice to Syf, one of Kellem's men collides with the Half-Orc breaking his grip with her and accidently hitting Syf with the cornor of his hand, while the blow would be considered little more than an faint nudge by most it nevertheless inflames the brash Half-Orc, a fury igniting in his eyes.

    "HO! You dare strike at good pretty lady with your hairy meat fingers!?" The Half-Orc grabs the goon by his arms and hoists him into the air to meet him at eye level, a growing look of anger becoming more evident on Gourd's face.
    "Even the abyss is too good for pretty lady strikers like you! Ho!!"

    Grabbing the goon by the his throat Gourd begins to squeeze tightly and with a subtle gesture quickly spins around and tosses the unfortunate man into the sand pits.

    "FLIGHTLESS BIRD GROWS WINGS!" The Half-Orc shouts as the goon is released from his grip and thrown high into the air before crashing down into the sand with a loud thud, several dust clouds lift up, though fortunatly the soft impact on the training sand leaves the goon more or less unharmed, albeit with a painful headache.

    Gourd turns to see a second attacker charging him and readys himself into a stance, however the second goon getting caught up in Ergo's @booinyoureyes cape sends the three men tumbling and rolling towards the Half-Orc. With a somewhat dramatic lift, Gourd jumps up avoiding the collision as the three men fall into the pit, no doubt eating several mouthfuls of sand in the process.

    Gourd walks over and lifts Ergo up by his collar and stands him up on his feet and gives him a thumbs up with a wide grin.

    "Ho! Good move strange little singy man! What do you call this cape tripping style?" Gourd slaps him on the back, pehaps with abit more force than he should.

  • KalesraKalesra Member Posts: 234
    Still looking rather confused, the halfling begins to stutter an explanation.

    "Well," he tells @Anduin‌, "That's a splendid rat you got there, and ah...well I was wondering if you might be interested in ah, having said rat participate in some activities, while strictly legal and all are in a somewhat gray area with respect to the rules of this establishment."

    He looks around shiftily. His voice becomes softer.

    "See, some of the rich ladies think it's real cute to watch fuzzy little animals fight and race and so on. They wager good money on it. Real gold, not these stupid tokens. And ah...let's just say that if the outcome is known in advance, certain individuals stand to gain a good deal from this sort of business."

    The halfling looks at Mystra again with an unwholesome grin.

    "In case you're wondering whether your little rat is gonna be in any danger," he says, "I assure you, it's completely safe. Absolutely risk free. And ah, totally reasonable seeing as we're outside of the jurisdiction of the Athkatla Gambling Board. And believe me, these idiots who run the place have got no idea there's real money on these contests. So there ain't no risk to you either. Just pure profit. So ah...whaddaya say? You interested?"

  • AnduinAnduin Member Posts: 5,745
    *Anduin places Mystra on the palm of his hand and begins to muse*

    So... fancy earning gold?

    WHAT! FIGHT! No! You have mistaken me for a Pseudo Dragon!

    You... have defenses.

    I'm not a blinkin hedgehog!

    Your right... let me buy you some cheese. *click* Waitress! A selection of cheese and grapes please... And here you go... A few extra credits for your troubles...

    Sorry... err... Sir? But we only accept gold pieces for food and lodging... We have complimentary food for your enjoyme~

    ~yeah, yeah, yeah. What complimentary cheese do you do?

    We did have pineapple and cheese on a stick... but we ran out of pineapple...

    No matter. Just cheese on sticks will do!

    We would love to accommodate you sir but we have also run out of sticks...

    *Anduin casts charm on waitress*


    I would give you all the cheese in the world if I could but we are in a planar pocket and our cheese is ported in from our carefully selected dairies who provide~

    Oh... bugger it.

    Certainly, allow me to~

    What! No! Stop! Leave! Go!

    We are going to STARVE!

    No. I don't need to eat.

    I'm going to STARVE!

    So... are you gonna earn your keep?

    Only if ALL my earnings go on cheese...

    As you wish my little, brave Rodenti Magi...

  • booinyoureyesbooinyoureyes Member Posts: 6,162
    edited March 2014
    Though Ergo is dodging blows left and right, he is worried that Kellem is on the offensive. His wound is also not helping his situation. However, as the two other rogues fly by them, blasted by Gourd's ( @Dreyy‌ ) Sonic Boomfists, both fighters are momentarily distracted, in awe of the Half-Orc's power.
    Ergo is first to recover his wits, and quickly backs away (in a very brave and not-at-all-afraid manner), casting the spell Stoneskin on the way.
    Covered from head to toe in large stone, he remembers another favorite move from his childhood picture-books.

    "Hey Gourd, catch me" he cries as he leaps into the Half-Orcs arms. "Now chuck me at the rogue as hard as you can, before my skins wear off! This one is called the fastball special."

    Ergo closes his eyes, preparing for launch
    wait a minute... didn't they say not to try this at home?


  • DreyyDreyy Member Posts: 118
    Lool @booinyoureyes those pics actually made me chuckle, such an unbreakable team! Ho!

    Gourd turns to the audience, who had once again gathered around to watch the new spectacule start. A roaring cheer once more fills the small sand pitts. Pointing at the crowd, his head bobbing up and down while the ballard of Ergo's @booinyoureyes lute continues to pump him with vigirous energy. He flexes and air punches in quick sucession, his still numb tounge slapping around as he does so.

    His attention is suddenly drawn to the bard who has coated himself in a thick layer of rock and stone and was now hurtling through the air. Gourd spins around and catches the flying man with an 'Ooof', clearly heavier than the Half-Orc expected.

    "Ho-sh! Littul shingey van needsh twoo gow on sh'diet!" Gourd gurgles with a nearly unillegible splutter.

    The Half-Orc notices Ergo is pointing towards Ergo and asking to be tossed at the brigand, it takes Gourd a few moments to process the information before finally giving a thumbs up and a grin.

    "Ho-sh! Ye'sh I, Gourd'sh undarshtand shrange littul shingey van!" he spits and dribbles.

    With a steady arm and his tounge still swaying in the breeze, Gourd begins to swing around in a circle while holding onto the bards stone ankles. Slowerly it grows in speed until finally the pair turn into a blur of a spiraling vortex before ending with a loud roar as Gourd lets go of Ergo and sends the stone covered bard hurtling at incredible speed for a collision course with Kellem. The crowd grows silent waiting for the impact.

  • KalesraKalesra Member Posts: 234
    edited March 2014
    As Kellem's associates lay dazed on the ground, the thief seems to decide that now would be the time to make an expeditious retreat. But a crowd has surrounded them, pressing in tightly to get a closer look at the bizarre scene.

    "Outta my way!" Kellem growls, waving his knife in an onlooker's face.

    A deafening roar tears through the air behind him.

    "What in the--"

    He turns around just in time to get a faceful of sonic-speed, stoneskin-enhanced bard. Ergo ( @booinyoureyes‌) feels the force of the impact ripple through his body, but no pain. Kellem is not so lucky. He screams in agony, his howls drowning out the horrible *crunch* of bone and *splat* of tissue.

    Ergo gets to his feet and sees that the pickpocket is laid out flat on his back, still breathing but in bad shape. Droplets of blood dot the sand of the practice arena. The thief groans softly and cradles his shattered arm. The crowd erupts in cheers.

    "Men, take these miscreants into custody!" Syf cries. Members of the security team push their way through the crowd and haul off the loudly moaning Kellem and his compatriots.

    "Well done, you two," Syf congratulates Ergo and Gourd ( @Dreyy). "I don't think I've ever seen anything like that in my life, and I've seen a lot in my travels across the plains."

    Anais emerges from the crowd and addresses Ergo with a wink and a smile.

    "Well, it looks like you're hired, my villain-vanquishing virtuoso!"

  • KalesraKalesra Member Posts: 234
    edited March 2014
    The halfling waits eagerly as @Anduin discusses the proposal with Mystra.

    "Did I mention that we have a practically unlimited supply of cheese for our little gladiators?" he grins. "All kinds. Cormyrian Cheddar, Tethyrian Tilsit, Rashemi Roquefort, Calemshite Comté, Lurien Limburger..."

    He reaches into his cloak and produces a cube of tart-smelling golden cheese.

    "This is just a taste," he says, offering the chunk of cheese to Mystra. "Here ya go, little lady. Eat up. There's more where that came from."

    He looks back at @Anduin‌ as Mystra begins to gluttonously devour her treat.

    "If you want in on the fun, all ya gotta do is sign this here contract."

    He pulls out a scroll and unfurls it in front of the mummy. It's longer than the halfling and crowded with thousands of lines of text so tiny as to be barely legible. @Anduin‌ must squint inches away from the surface of the parchment to make anything out.

    This contract is made this 1st day of Ches, 1374....blah blah blah....In consideration of the mutual agreements herein contained, both parties agree...blah blah blah....

    "I assure you it's all really boring," the halfling says dismissively. "Basically it just says your rat agrees to fight for us, we get a 15% cut of the winnings, and you get all the rest of the gold and as much cheese as you want. Oh...and we ain't liable for accidents."

  • AnduinAnduin Member Posts: 5,745
    edited March 2014
    5% and you will see my hand sign the contract twice.

    *Anduin casts Detect Evil, the contract starts to glow a deep crimson red...*

    But surely Anduin can't you see...



  • booinyoureyesbooinyoureyes Member Posts: 6,162
    edited March 2014
    Ergo, with a bit of struggle, stands up. He sways a bit back and forth, while his lute Lurica floats over to him and starts to play a little tune that sounds suspiciously like a cuckoo clock. With the music little illusionary colorful stars fly in a circle around the now flesh and bone bard's head. He sways a little back and forth, but steadies himself by placing a hand firmly upon the broad shoulders of the half-orc brawler.


    He turns to Anais "*gasp* My thanks, Loveliness. We will discuss the *pant* dull and dreary details of payment later, now is the time to *cough* celebrate!"

    He turns to the broad-shouldered monk @Dreyy‌ who is now showing off by flexing and throwing punches and kicks into the air in a celebratory fashion. Lurica floats toward him, finishing his imaginary punches and kicks with magical, balloon-lettered super-imposed onomatopoeia


    The bard lets out a big grin
    "Hail to the champ!" he lets out as he begins to sway back and forth, slowly but surely losing his balance. He has bruises on one eye and a slightly bloodied limb. Then as his eyes roll toward the back before the sand of the arena appears to rise up and meet his face, he lets out in a uncharacteristically mumbling voice
    "Yo Anais... I did it"

    The bard falls seemingly unconscious into the waiting arms of Anais, his eyes closed and head laid back comfortably against the lady's shoulder. The hostess has a slightly worried look on her face, and begins to pat down his forehead.
    "Lets take care of these wounds, you brave man. I know a spell or two"
    As the hostess drags him off the arena in her warm, comforting embrace the bard opens his eyes to send a quick toothy grin, a sly wink and a thumbs up toward the jubilant monk.

    Post edited by booinyoureyes on
  • AnduinAnduin Member Posts: 5,745
    [Spoiler]Just realised I have little left that post without a clear ending... Also... If Mystra fights... What class is she? Level? Spell casting or innate abilities does she possess?[/spoiler]

    *The halfling reacts to Anduin's proposal with the greasy, smooth slickness of a professional haggler...*

    5%? Look 10% and it'll be like cutting me own throat.



    Mystra, I am going to train you in the art of gladatorial combat! You are now part of an exclusive club that fight for money, fame, honour and glory!

    You mean pedigree pets that fight to the death or STARVE club... Why did I choose you...

  • DreyyDreyy Member Posts: 118
    Rubbing his chin, Gourd watches as Ergo @booinyoureyes is dragged out of the arena, obviously still dazed by the pairs last move. He gives him a toothy grin and a thumbs up before charging over to Syf @Kalesra and grabbing one of her hands.

    "Ho-sh! It'sh-" he pauses, noticing his tounge was still numb and flapping carelessly.

    He pinchs it between his fingers in an attempt to bring it back to life but ultimatly leads to failure. Lifting one hand up and starting to perform several hand gestures, his hand begins to glow a faint blue and with a quick snap of his wrist, strikes his paralzed tongue with a subtle but firm finger slap. His tounge with almost a life of its own springs to life before retreating back into the Half-Orc's mouth. A few chomps and licks ensure it was back to working fashion. Resuming his prior composure of gripping Syf's hand he bows slightly.

    "Ho! There is no need to thank I, Gourd pretty lady!" he points at the villanous Kellem being carted away and gives him a stirn fist shaking,
    "Such foul brigands who insult good name of I, Gourd and pretty lady must always meet with righteous and firm Punchy Fist justice! HO!"

    The moment is broken with the Half-Orcs stomach rumbling loudly. Curiously Gourd straightens himself and rubs his stomach, no doubt the recent activities have brought a ferice hunger over the muscular Half-Orc. He bashfully smiles before giving a roaring laugh.

    "Ho! But now is not time for words of comfort and flirtyness! Now is feasting time!" he grabs Syf by the arm, the gesture lifts her up off the ground with remarkable ease,
    "Ho! Come pretty lady i shall escort you to feasting of meats and fruits! Ho!" he points his other hand at Ergo who was still being cared for by Anais,
    "Wait strange little singy man! You and pretty Elven lady shall join! Ho! I, Gourd insist on feasting with strong warrior of cape tripping and rock throwing style! Ho!"

    If the offer was wanted or not by the others isnt clear, this however dousnt seem to bother Gourd as he scroops them up and proceeds to head towards the smell of cooking food. A wide grin beaming on his face, Gourd briefly stops and eyes up Hectran and his wooden construct.

    "Ho! You kicky man and wooden foe shall join too!" Grabbing them too the Half-Orc toddles off once more to seek food, carrying quite happily in each arm his new compatriots.

  • LadyRhianLadyRhian Member Posts: 14,694
    edited March 2014
    A Young woman, extremely tall and muscular steps into the house, wearing a royal blue silk shirt and navy blue dyed leather pants (Not armor, mind you, just like leather jacket leather). Black high soft leather boots adorn her feet and a sword hangs from a black leather belt tied around her waist. Her hair is black as night, and smooth and straight as silk, until it is caught up in a single warrior's braid behind her head and hangs to the back of her waist. Her eyes are a blue nearly as deep as her shirt, and her regular features are quite frankly, beautiful. But she is tall, possibly close to 6'8 in her stocking feet, and her eyes are sharp rather than placid. You get the feeling she misses little. She raises her hand to her chin as she looks around the place, and beneath the cuff of her shirt, you see a glint of silver or platinum around her wrist. This is matched by a necklace of fine moonstones around her neck, and a small ring set with a green stone on the little finger of her right hand. A coin pouch heavy with coins adorns her belt, and a second no lighter balances it on the other side. Over one shoulder, she carries a massive Composite Long Bow, as thick around as most men's wrists.

    Caught by the sight of the fighting rings, she heads that way, picking her way carefully through the crowd, careful not to bump anyone or step on their feet.

  • KalesraKalesra Member Posts: 234
    Mystra is a level 5 Rat Mage, a Wizard kit which I have just invented. She has 1d4 hp per level--her current max HP is 16. AC 5, THAC0 19, 1d2 piercing damage. She is naturally immune to poison due to a rough childhood eating sewer sludge. She can also hide in shadows (50%) and can cast the following spells:
    Level 1 (4 slots):
    Jump (Target creature can jump 30 feet straight up or forward, 10 feet backwards. Duration 1d3 + 1/lvl rounds)
    Enlarge (Target creature increases in size by 10%/level. Base damage is increased by the same percentage, rounded up)
    Shield (AC 2 vs thrown weapons, AC 3 vs other missile weapons, AC 4 vs all other weapons. Duration 5 rounds/lvl)
    Shocking Grasp (Touch attack, 1 round/lvl to make attack. 1d8 + 1/lvl electrical damage)
    Level 2 (2 slots):
    Stinking Cloud (The Rat Mage version only fills a 5 ft cube. Targets caught in the cloud must save vs. poison or become so nauseated that they are unable to attack for 1d4 + 1 rounds. Mystra is immune).
    Level 3 (1 slot):
    Summon Rat Guardians (Conjure 2d4 Rat Warriors: 1d4 HP, AC 7, THAC0 20, 1 attack/round, 1d3 piercing damage)

    "Well, now that the formalities are all settled," the halfling grins, "let me show you our facilities."

    He leads @Anduin‌ and Mystra to an area of the gambling house which hosts a swarm of young nobles in flowing, brightly colored silks. They are all gathered around a small arena, where a ferret and a rabbit are locked in combat. There are gasps and cheers as the little animals tussle in the tiny fighting pit. Another halfling keeps a shifty eye on the guards, surreptitiously taking bets from the onlookers when security is looking in the other direction. Several other small animals rest on red velvet pillows in their owners' laps. @Anduin‌ spots a few more rats, a rabbit, a small black cat, a fearie dragon, and a couple of imps.

    "Hehe, the money is on the ferret to win," the halfling tells @Anduin‌, "But everyone underestimates the cute little bunny rabbit. Just keep watchin'."

    The rabbit scuffles away after being tossed to the ground by the ferret, and raises its paws in the air. A dart of magical energy shoots forward and strikes the ferret with an awful sizzling noise. The ferret falls to the arena floor.

    "No! Snuffles!" a young nobleman cries. He scoops the creature up from the arena, his face contorted with distress. "My poor snuffles!" One of the arena managers runs up with a small vial of potion and tips it into the ferret's mouth. The creature twitches, stretches, and in a second is darting to and fro as its master cries with relief. After checking to make sure there are no guards about, the manager hands a heavy pouch of gold to the young lady who is now holding the victorious rabbit.

    "See!" the halfling cries. "Isn't it exciting? Whaddaya say, little lady? Ready for your first fight?"
    Will write some other responses soon, hopefully later today. Sorry I'm a little slow.

  • AnduinAnduin Member Posts: 5,745
    [Spoiler]Awesome! The other pets contenders are owned by mere nobles...HA! I'm going to abuse that knowledge![/spoiler]

    Okay. I know what to do!

    *Anduin strides into the pit and holds aloft Mystra studiously ignoring the halfling waving his hands about in warning*

    This is MYSTRA THE MYSTERIOUS MASTER OF MIGRAINES! This rat has tussled with elephants! Wrestled with tigers! Fought with lions! And given MIGRAINES to many a seasoned warrior!

    'Ere, how does a rat give you a migraine?

    That sir, is a MYSTERY! Who will fight the undefeated, undisputed MASTER of the ring!

    *Mystra notes the many cat owning nobles*

    I wish to have it on record, that if I had the choice, I would choose another owner...

  • AnduinAnduin Member Posts: 5,745
    *Anduin holds Mystra aloft in the circle of nobles... Everyone stares... Most aghast at the Mummie... Silence fills the tent*

    I need to go pee...

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