About Jaheira's romance, yeah it's a bit creepy but I think it's less objectionable than Viconia. Remember that Viconia is hundreds years old, comes from a matriarchal and misandrist society where men are little more than disposable slaves, and that Charname is a 21 years old sheltered most of his life in a monastery.
And that a lot of rationalizations/justifications I've seen for players completing her romance is that they can redeem her.
It's a little patronizing to claim to be in a relationship with someone to "make them better" and also we only know this is possible in hindsight. There could be every chance that Paladin Charname is romancing her and hoping to convince her to turn away from Shar, but Viconia could instead betray us or abandon us. Or worse, manage to corrupt us and turn us toward evil. That's what Shar's clerics are supposed to do. It's just fortunate that the game doesn't allow Viconia to act like a proper cleric of Shar.
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It's a little patronizing to claim to be in a relationship with someone to "make them better" and also we only know this is possible in hindsight. There could be every chance that Paladin Charname is romancing her and hoping to convince her to turn away from Shar, but Viconia could instead betray us or abandon us. Or worse, manage to corrupt us and turn us toward evil. That's what Shar's clerics are supposed to do. It's just fortunate that the game doesn't allow Viconia to act like a proper cleric of Shar.