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Forsooth, methinks you are no ordinary talking chicken!

DjimmyDjimmy Member Posts: 749
in Archive (General Discussion)
So what are the lines in BG that make you laugh?
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Comments

  • ErinneErinne Member Posts: 151
    KidCarnival said:

    Xzar's.

    I know dragons with feet like rabbits! 'tis true I swear!

    His voice just makes everything hilarious :D.
  • CuvCuv Member, Developer Posts: 2,535
    Being on fire is part of being on the team! (Black Pits)
  • DJKajuruDJKajuru Member Posts: 3,300
    Corvino said:

    "You know what I always say? Kill the mouthy one first."

    The PC actually gets a couple of badass/funny lines compared to most games. Only Planescape: Torment gives you as many options to be a cheeky sod.

    I looove that line!

    "you killed 33 children, and may all the Gods and their solars.." curse is funny too!
  • KidCarnivalKidCarnival Member Posts: 3,747
    Eudaemonium said:

    @KidCarnival: I'm starting to find this thread almost...palatable.

    Was it just me, or did that line make you think Xzar was thinking about eating the party?

    I certainly wouldn't put it past him. "You most slanderous harlot" is probably my favorite insult in the game, too, especially when he says it to Jaheira for no reason.
  • EudaemoniumEudaemonium Member Posts: 3,199
    Togglebottom said:

    "Why do I live in such a pissant town?" -Thalantyr

    I think this is definitely one of my favourites.

  • DjimmyDjimmy Member Posts: 749
    edited February 2013
    lol

    Guard: Halt! Where do you think you're going?
    Protagonist: Upstairs. Where do YOU think you're going?

    Edit:

    Nalia: [after the Protagonist gives a beggar gold] That was a nice thing to do. Although I'm sure you could spare a lot more...what are you saving up for? A golden sword?
    Jan: Now, now, Nalia. A golden sword wouldn't be so bad...except maybe for the weight. And the softness. Pretty much only good for one swing, actually. Hmmm...tell me, just why are you planning on buying a golden sword, anyway? Sounds pretty useless to me.
    Protagonist: I never said I was going to--
    Jan: Oh, don't go and tell me you don't want one. I've heard you mumbling in your sleep, you chatty little man. But never mind...I'd like to see you try and fight with one.
  • MoradinMoradin Member Posts: 372
    edited February 2013
    My Father was a miner. And my mother was a miner BEFORE him (Yeslik).
    I've never heard this line in my previous games, might it be they added some new ones? Or they unlocked some old old ones? Anyway, it made me laugh.
    Anyway, BG is filled with funny lines. When meeting aristocrats sometimes they would go: don't touch me! I am super-important! Also, Edwin I think has some of the best lines in the game, BG2 included:
    "Greetings, I am Edwin Odesseiron. You simians may refer to me merely as *Sir*, if you prefer a less... syllable-intensive workout."
  • KidCarnivalKidCarnival Member Posts: 3,747
    Moradin said:

    Anyway, BG is filled with funny lines. When meeting aristocrats sometimes they would go: don't touch me! I am super-important!

    Oh, totally forgot! I love that one most from the Beregost priest. And for some reason, the way the sirines sing makes me lol, too.
    Moradin said:

    Also, Edwin I think has some of the best lines in the game, BG2 included: "Greetings, I am Edwin Odesseiron. You simians may refer to me merely as *Sir*, if you prefer a less... syllable-intensive workout."

    In that case, I wish there was some reaction to having an even longer name for charname. My BG2 thief's name is longer and arguably harder to spell than Edwin's, and he's an arrogant prick. The conversation in my roleplay-mind usually ends in my thief telling Edwin his name and adding that he wishes to be addressed by full name at all times, not offering a shorter or easier version.

  • LemernisLemernis Member, Moderator Posts: 4,318
    "We're a hoard of rampaging Tarrasques! Kree! Kree!"
  • UnknownQuantityUnknownQuantity Member Posts: 242
    Get me out of this hell hole always sticks in me head. It's not funny, but it kind of is as they keep saying it.
  • NoonNoon Member Posts: 202
    Slythe : "Oh, baby, you know me. You know your Slythie... Hey, you, don't you go watchin' us go all mushy, all right? It ain't none of your business..." and the whole dialogue between Slythe and Krystin.
  • CherudekCherudek Member Posts: 73
    Korax thinks you look very tasty today.
  • KirkorKirkor Member Posts: 700
    "AWAYYY WITH YOU BEGGAR!"
    "Get away from me! I may catch something."
  • FlashburnFlashburn Member Posts: 1,847
    "*COUGH, COUGH* *APLUUAHIHAAA!...* My lung!! It's flopping all over the dirt!"
    - Beggar

    "I just came here to buy some turnips, I swear!"
    - Gnome commoners

    "And this one's fer gramma, who said I'd never amount to anything more than a butter knife!"
    - Lilarcor
  • MoradinMoradin Member Posts: 372
    Good ol' Lilarcor!
    "My brother is a +12 Hackmaster!"
    "Kill it! Kill it quick before they're all gone!"
    Epic quotes! I remember in BG2 I didn't really use it anyways, there were much better swords out there. But I still kept it, just for the lols.
  • moopymoopy Member Posts: 938
    I wish they had more intelligent weapons, that had more serious roles.

    I played a MUD a long time ago that had a sword, the Holy Avenger. It was an intelligent good aligned sword, that WOULDN'T let you unequip it, and ALWAYS attacked evil enemies if you were in the room with them.

    It forced you to go on a crusade of good killing all evil.
  • SCARY_WIZARDSCARY_WIZARD Member Posts: 1,438
    "A pleasure to meet a socially...acceptable person, such as yourself."
  • ScytheKnightScytheKnight Member Posts: 220
    "Well you always where a little cockeyed so I guess that doesn't count."

    "Nine lives my ass! Give me my own pet necromancer and I'll do the same!"

    "You want my advice? Find someone rich, and kill them. Then find someone richer, and kill them too! Hack and slash your way to fortune! WOOHOO!"

    "Don't mind me, I'm just a floating skull, heh" (OK, OK so it's PST bite me, love that game.)
  • NonnahswriterNonnahswriter Member Posts: 2,520
    "I can dance on the head of a pin, as well!"

    "Er... You're all right behind me...right?"

    -Courtesy of Yoshimo. My favorite character in all the Baldur's Gate universe.
    ...*sniff* ;_;


    I'm also a big fan of lines that break the 4th wall. Khalid is especially good at this: "Cl-Click on someone y-your own size!"
  • davendaven Member Posts: 112
    'Guard: Halt! Where do you think you're going?
    Protagonist: Upstairs. Where do YOU think you're going?'

    That one cracks me up.

    Of course it goes without saying but i'll include it anyway.

    Ok, I've just about had my FILL of riddle asking, quest assigning, insult throwing, pun hurling, hostage taking, iron mongering, smart arsed fools, freaks, and felons that continually test my will, mettle, strength, intelligence, and most of all, patience! If you've got a straight answer ANYWHERE in that bent little head of yours, I want to hear it pretty damn quick or I'm going to take a large blunt object roughly the size of Elminster AND his hat, and stuff it lengthwise into a crevice of your being so seldom seen that even the denizens of the nine hells themselves wouldn't touch it with a twenty-foot rusty halberd! Have I MADE myself perfectly CLEAR?!
  • emjayemjay Member Posts: 84
    Dost thou mockest me?
  • ShrimpShrimp Member Posts: 142
    Corvino said:

    "You know what I always say? Kill the mouthy one first."

    HA! A good saying! I will use your head for a puppet and make it say it over and over while we drink large amounts of mead! Life is pretty good, you know?
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