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Which NPC encounter do you find the funniest?

StormvesselStormvessel Member Posts: 654
My own favorite isn't even really funny, but for some reason I couldn't stop laughing.

"Seated with me are Farluck the Fearless, Turpin the Roaring Ranger, and Nelik the Most Devious and Fiendish of Thieves! (We owe him money so he gets the good title...)"

I am interested in hearing your favorites, if you're interested in sharing them.

Comments

  • StormvesselStormvessel Member Posts: 654
    edited June 2014
    elminster said:

    Niemain: Oh, look! What a cute little party... invading our space! We were preparing a ritual, and you all but ruined it.

    Charname: What do you mean your space? This is a store and I'm a customer.

    Niemain: Thank you for that wonderful display of simian logic, now scram.

    Charname: For your information, a number of important sociological and psychological theorists have posited that stores exist in an intermediate space, neither private nor public in nature but combining elements of both. Displays in store windows, for instance, can best be viewed as mental constructs projected onto the public consciousness as a means of engendering mass conformity derived solely from the supposedly private domain of consumer choice...

    Niemain: Ack! It's enough to drive one mad... Make it stop, make it stop!
    ------------------------------------------------------------------

    I like it because the paragraph about stores and store windows reminds me of some of the discussions/topics in the university courses I've taken hehe.

    Speaking of university courses, I just realized why the thing with the three thieves is so funny to me. It's classic psychology - two or more separate ideas come together in a subtle and silly way.

    On one hand, I imagine three moronic young thieves sitting around somewhere, arguing over a title. Because one thief was owed money, he got the good title. They put undue weight on, of all things, a silly title??? What are they, the three stooges?

    And on the other hand, the text is worded as "we owe him money so he gets THE good title", as if there were only one good title to be had; as if they didn't have the ability to think up anything else (lending further weight to the first thought - that they are incompetent).
  • JuliusBorisovJuliusBorisov Member, Administrator, Moderator, Developer Posts: 22,725
    From all the new NPCs, I've liked the most the scene of Dorn slaughtering nasty bandits with odd powers and his dialog on the road to Nashkel Mines. A good introduction: tells a word or two about his personality, his power and voice-acting adds too.
  • elminsterelminster Member, Developer Posts: 16,315
    Cespenar reminds me of Zathras in Babylon 5. :)
  • booinyoureyesbooinyoureyes Member Posts: 6,164
    This is from Icewind Dale but it is one of my favorites from any Infinity Engine game

    Ghereg the Ogre in that tower outside of Kuldahar Pass
    "Head hurt! Why you make Ghereg head hurt skinny people?"
    "We make your head hurt because you are a big dummy, haha!" rofl

    but if you deny it he says "Why it hurt then? Why? Why? Ghereg want to pound head through walls make pain go away." (heh, classic Ghereg)
    "I think that's an excellent idea, Ghereg. Hitting your head against the wall *as hard as you can* will certainly make the pain go away. It's an old Rhaegadaeran barbarian remedy. Go ahead, try it!"

    That poor guy is awesome
  • lolienlolien Member, Moderator, Translator (NDA) Posts: 3,108
    Oh, and i almost forget Larze from the Blushing Mermaid! The best (real) ogre in the game!
  • the_spyderthe_spyder Member Posts: 5,018

    (heh, classic Ghereg)

    Wait. You mean to say that there is a more contemporary Ghereg?

  • GallowglassGallowglass Member Posts: 3,356
    CrevsDaak said:

    The Chinchilla-Bhaalspawns in ToB, the first time I played the game, I had to hit pause because I was laughing a lot :P

    Mmm, yeah, that was funny ... but have you ever seen what that chinchilla transforms into if you force him into melee (and don't let him run away as soon as he's hurt)? Doubles the laugh!

  • lolienlolien Member, Moderator, Translator (NDA) Posts: 3,108

    CrevsDaak said:

    The Chinchilla-Bhaalspawns in ToB, the first time I played the game, I had to hit pause because I was laughing a lot :P

    Mmm, yeah, that was funny ... but have you ever seen what that chinchilla transforms into if you force him into melee (and don't let him run away as soon as he's hurt)? Doubles the laugh!

    Don't remember. I wasn't there for ages now, sadly.
  • CrevsDaakCrevsDaak Member Posts: 7,155

    CrevsDaak said:

    The Chinchilla-Bhaalspawns in ToB, the first time I played the game, I had to hit pause because I was laughing a lot :P

    Mmm, yeah, that was funny ... but have you ever seen what that chinchilla transforms into if you force him into melee (and don't let him run away as soon as he's hurt)? Doubles the laugh!

    Yes, yes, I meant the whole encounter, it was all great!
    Also Lauchegar (iirc his name :P) in the Red Sheaf Inn sings Monty Python's Lumberjack song :D
  • booinyoureyesbooinyoureyes Member Posts: 6,164

    (heh, classic Ghereg)

    Wait. You mean to say that there is a more contemporary Ghereg?

    Yep. His name was Lou and he used a club
  • GallowglassGallowglass Member Posts: 3,356
    CrevsDaak said:

    Also Lauchegar (iirc his name :P) in the Red Sheaf Inn sings Monty Python's Lumberjack song :D

    Lachluger. But yes, very entertaining.
  • StormvesselStormvessel Member Posts: 654
    edited June 2014
    bengoshi said:

    From all the new NPCs, I've liked the most the scene of Dorn slaughtering nasty bandits with odd powers and his dialog on the road to Nashkel Mines. A good introduction: tells a word or two about his personality, his power and voice-acting adds too.

    "Today is THAT DAY!" :)

    Really good voice acting. I believe the actor also did some work in the Elder Scrolls 4 (the Gray Prince).
  • TressetTresset Member, Moderator Posts: 8,264
    CrevsDaak said:

    The Chinchilla-Bhaalspawns in ToB, the first time I played the game, I had to hit pause because I was laughing a lot :P

    @CrevsDaak‌ I like Chinchilla too! Can you tell?

    There are a lot of funny parts in the game. One of my favorites is Portalbendarwinden. Everything about that guy is hilarious!
  • Demonoid_LimewireDemonoid_Limewire Member Posts: 424
    Tiax! Rules all (npc encounters!) :P !
  • CrevsDaakCrevsDaak Member Posts: 7,155
    Tresset said:

    CrevsDaak said:

    The Chinchilla-Bhaalspawns in ToB, the first time I played the game, I had to hit pause because I was laughing a lot :P

    CrevsDaak‌ I like Chinchilla too! Can you tell?

    There are a lot of funny parts in the game. One of my favorites is Portalbendarwinden. Everything about that guy is hilarious!
    @Tresset‌ hahaha, that encounter is also great! But I never could spell that name correctely.
  • DragonspearDragonspear Member Posts: 1,838
    Cespinar is one of the redeeming things in ToB. I can't help but crack up at the lines for all the items.
  • StormvesselStormvessel Member Posts: 654
    edited June 2014
    kiwidoc said:

    I love it when you first meet Boo in BG2 - not Minsc, but Boo. And I really don't want to think about where Boo hid .......

    Mr. Slave and lemmiwinks.

    Giggity.
  • TressetTresset Member, Moderator Posts: 8,264
    Baeloth.
  • StormvesselStormvessel Member Posts: 654
    Tresset said:

    Baeloth.

    Ever wonder why he has high intelligence when intelligence is useless for a sorcerer?
  • GallowglassGallowglass Member Posts: 3,356

    Tresset said:

    Baeloth.

    Ever wonder why he has high intelligence when intelligence is useless for a sorcerer?
    INT is probably a prerequisite for promptly and perspicaciously producing appallingly agonising alliterations.

  • StormvesselStormvessel Member Posts: 654

    Tresset said:

    Baeloth.

    Ever wonder why he has high intelligence when intelligence is useless for a sorcerer?
    INT is probably a prerequisite for promptly and perspicaciously producing appallingly agonising alliterations.

    If my eyes continue rolling at this speed they will catch fire ;)
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