[UNOFFICIAL] Ask Hexxat Anything

Sasayaki · October 2013

Hexxat: Like it says, guys. Ask me anything.

Note from @LiamEsler: This thread is unofficial and is purely for fan-fun. Only blue-tinged posts are by Overhaul.

Illustair · October 2013

Are you romanceable? (Heck if you'd ask that IRL)

meagloth · October 2013

Miniature giant space hamsters?

Qbert · October 2013

what makes you worth bringing along with me?

marceror · October 2013

You luv long time?

stygga · October 2013

Are you aware your name spelled backwards is Taxxeh?

Sasayaki · October 2013

Illustair said:
Are you romanceable? (Heck if you'd ask that IRL)

Hexxat: Are you hitting on me?

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: More seriously, I guess it depends on how nicely you ask.

LordRumfish · October 2013

What is the purpose of being?

Sasayaki · October 2013

meagloth said:
Miniature giant space hamsters?

Hexxat: They're freaking awesome! Minsc's Boo is so cute. I didn't used to believe that they existed, but he converted me. I want one of my own. I'll call her "Dorn".

Sasayaki · October 2013

Qbert said:
what makes you worth bringing along with me?

Hexxat: You must be kidding if you're really asking me this.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Okay, here goes. Firstly: I am a first rate thief. My stats are perfect for my class, and there's no wishy-washy, diluted multiclassing happening here. I am a pure class thief, and I do what I do like nobody else can.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Secondly, my banters. Seriously, this stuff is the best! My voice actress really bought me to life. I always have something to say, no matter what's going on around me. You should see me and Korgan go at it. The trick isn't getting me to talk, the trick's figuring out how to make me shut up!

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Lastly... I have my own quest, and it's really awesome. It's more sad than anything else, but that's the core of good writing; eliciting an emotional response. It's not sappy like Aerie's ("waaah my wings are gone!" Sheesh, enough already, we know!), and it's not melodramatic like Jaheera's. It's more like Vinconia's romance, really. Sad, but... kind of cool. If you don't have room in your party for this cat, a hex upon you!

Sasayaki · October 2013

marceror said:
You luv long time?

Hexxat: You gotta buy me dinner first. Or I can steal one for us!

Sasayaki · October 2013

stygga said:
Are you aware your name spelled backwards is Taxxeh?

Hexxat: I totally am. Did you know Taxxeh in Infernal means 'droll aasimar turd'? Made my childhood a whole barrel of laughs, I tell you what.

Sasayaki · October 2013

LordRumfish said:
What is the purpose of being?

Hexxat: The simple answer is: it's complicated.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: It all depends on the kind of person you are. If you're the family kind, then your purpose is to settle down with someone you love, make as many kids as you can stand, and then live a fat and happy life surrounded by that which makes you really happy.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Not everyone's like that though. I'm certainly not.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: For some people, all they need is adventure. A life with purpose, where you learn and grow.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: You're that kind of person, I think. You're adventuresome. You've always got somewhere to go, something to do. You're brave.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: You know what happens to brave people, though?

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: They die.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Look, I don't want to talk about this any more, okay? Just... just try to live your life as best you can, and to your own self be true.

BackgroundCharacter · October 2013

What kind of name is Hexxat

Sasayaki · October 2013

BackgroundCharacter said:
What kind of name is Hexxat

Hexxat: What kind of name is "BackgroundCharacter"?

Jalily · October 2013

I love this topic!

Sasayaki · October 2013

Jalily said:
I love this topic!

Hexxat: Are you... hitting on me?

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: But seriously, thanks!

enqenq · October 2013

My PC thief pickpocketed Ihtafeer's head without her noticing. I dare you to top that.

Sasayaki · October 2013

enqenq said:
My PC thief pickpocketed Ihtafeer's head without her noticing. I dare you to top that.

Hexxat: Childsplay. I used to do such things as a child; nick people's body parts, that kind of thing. Heads. Torsos. I even stole someone's whole body once. But you know what the best thing I ever stole was?

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Nothing.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: It sounds weird, but it's true. My greatest success as a thief was the day I stole nothing at all.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: I wasn't always this good. At the thief's craft, I mean. I had to start somewhere. I got my start in the slums, as most of us do. When you're born into crushing poverty and your little sister's crying because she's hungry, and there's no food, you'll do a lot of crazy things. Let's just say that pretty girls do a lot worse to get by.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Anyway, I lifted the occasional purse, nothing more than that. Just what we needed. One day, though... I stole from a man named Al'Rakkam. If you've ever been to Calimshan, you'd know that name. The greatest thief in the whole city.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: I was frightened, too. Don't look at me like that, you would be too if you were holding over a thousand pieces of Al'Rakkam's gold. My sister and I went into hiding, but I realised something that first night, something that would change my life forever.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: I had an out.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: If I got caught stealing, this purse of gold would pay for a bribe. I could try for greater things, harder marks, and if it went sour my sister and I would be okay.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: So I trained. I studied the marks. I went from a passable thief to one of the best around. I made a name for myself. My sister and I lived in luxury.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: And I never got caught. That bag of gold I kept on me all those years, using it to inspire me. Soon a thousand gold was nothing to me, but I always knew where it came from. So I went to return it.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: So I arranged a meeting with Al'Rakkam. I explained the situation and offered him the gold back.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: I don't know what I was expecting. Maybe he'd be angry. Maybe he'd be insulted. Maybe he'd offer my head to the local Pasha.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Instead, he offered me a job.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: It had all been a big test. I hadn't "stolen" it at all; he'd practically dropped it in my hands. I should have known. And the thing was, he'd given away hundreds of the same pouches, all to promising thieves. A kind of... master-thief scholarship. I'd been the first to return it.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: I wasn't the last, though.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Jan Jansen: That's a nice story, but I think it would have been better with-

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Yeah. I know. Don't say it.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Jaheira: But wait, Hexxat. Khalid was from Calimshan and never once did he tell me of this... Al'Rakkam.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Look. Maybe I changed a few of the details, but that story was basically true... for someone. I don't want to talk about this any more. Just remember that it's not what you stole that matters, it's why, and what effect that had on your life. The rest is just... well, just bragging. Banter for taverns and inns, nothing more.

SCARY_WIZARD · October 2013

Which do you prefer, Hexxat?: Cats, dogs, or a third option?

ICN · October 2013

Wait, so after falling for Al'Rakkam trap you spent the next few years of your life honing your pickpocketing skills? Er, don't call us, we'll call you.

Sasayaki · October 2013

SCARY_WIZARD said:
Which do you prefer, Hexxat?: Cats, dogs, or a third option?

Hexxat: Hamsters! Hamsters and cats. They're both good.

Sasayaki · October 2013

ICN said:
Wait, so after falling for Al'Rakkam trap you spent the next few years of your life honing your pickpocketing skills? Er, don't call us, we'll call you.

Hexxat: Al'Rakkam plays the long game. When you're a genasi, you can live hundreds of years if not more. A few years are nothing to him.

Illustair · October 2013

What do you have that Viconia doesn't? Aside from thieving skills of course.

enqenq · October 2013

Did you arrange Yoshimo's death just because he could dance on the head of a pin and you couldn't?

Corvino · October 2013

Is this for real? And don't try using epistemology to bring in the subjective nature of human perceptions of reality.

Sasayaki · October 2013

Illustair said:
What do you have that Viconia doesn't? Aside from thieving skills of course.

Hexxat: I have a rocking tattoo. No, you can't see it, because let's just say we're not that friendly yet. All Vi-corny-ah has is a penchant for complaining and overuse of the word 'rivel'.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: I mean, seriously. She goes on and on about the terrible racism that she's endured as a drow, but doesn't think to stop it with the racial slurs for even half a second? Only days after almost being burned at the stake and, get this, saved by a bunch of surface dwellers? Sheesh... that's gratitude for you.

Sasayaki · October 2013

enqenq said:
Did you arrange Yoshimo's death just because he could dance on the head of a pin and you couldn't?

Hexxat: Why do you think I can't dance on the head of a pin?

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: And no comment. Let's just say that he got what he deserved, in my opinion. If he was stupid enough to get a geas put on him, well... it's hard to be sympathetic.

Sasayaki · October 2013

Corvino said:
Is this for real? And don't try using epistemology to bring in the subjective nature of human perceptions of reality.

Hexxat: Is anything we do re- oh, well played.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Well, I don't know. I mean, if you play through Baldur's Gate now, and you have Viconia in your party, that's real to you. But if I play through, and I murder that skank because I can't stand her whining about how the daylight burns her eyes, then that's real to me.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: I suppose what I'm trying to say is that what's real is axomatic but relative. What's real to you is real, because it's real to you. If you think I'm the real Hexxat... then I am. But I'm not the *only* Hexxat.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Besides. You're asking a professional thief a hard question and expecting an honest answer? C'mon.

Xzar · October 2013

Whats your relationship with Viconia? If CHARNAME is into polyamory, can he create "Swedish family" with you two?

Sasayaki · October 2013

Xzar said:
Whats your relationship with Viconia? If CHARNAME is into polyamory, can he create "Swedish family" with you two?

Hexxat: Going to be totally honest here. We're not good friends.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Look. She's a great cleric. I get that. And, let's face it, Shar is a pretty sweet deity. So you'd think we'd get along like a house on fire.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Jaheira: Not literally, one would hope.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Uh, no. Of course... not. No. Never.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: But, yeah. The problem is -- Viconia's the worst kind of liar. A bad one.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Her whole story about coming to the surface smells funny to me, and I'm someone who spent their childhood lying and being lied to, so I know the liars when I see them. She admitted that she made up the story with the farmers. She went into such detail, and spoke with such passion, that pretty much everyone was taken in. And I mean everyone.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: What did she have to gain from that? What's her angle? There's no gold. No jewels she could pilfer from it. Her obvious deception didn't earn her a dented copper. So why did she lie?

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: I think she just enjoyed the attention.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Lying for profit I can understand, especially when you're on the clock. Lying to save your hide, I can get that too. But I don't understand why Viconia lied about the farmers, because there's no gain to it. There's just no *reason*.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: And if she's willing to lie about that... maybe that baby thing never happened at all.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Viconia: Your musings about my motivations amuse me, rivel. You are as a wagon stuck in mud; the beast that is your mind strains and pulls, whipped by some unseen driver, but you only exhaust yourself.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Is everything a joke to you, Vikkie?

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Viconia: Vikkie? That's a nickname worthy of a dark spot in the Demonweb Pits, Hexxat.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Maybe I'll see you there, you white haired harlot!

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Viconia: I would hope so. I certainly wouldn't want to go to the celestial realms when I pass. Better to rule in the pit, as they say...

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: The only thing you'll rule is the buffet stand. You're really letting yourself go.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Viconia: You misunderstand. The Crom Feyr sets my strength to 25. That kind of strength just can't happen without a commiserate increase in muscle mass-

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Fatty fatty dark elf!

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Viconia: Oh, such a wounding wit. How*ever* will I recover from the childish taunts of a simpering street dwelling guttersnipe who dares to crawl beyond her station?

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: That full plate does make you look fat though. Just saying.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: So yeah. I guess it's theoretically possible for CHARNAME to be the meat in this action-girl sandwich, but let's be honest here, I don't think they make beds large enough to accommodate a certain dark elven backside.

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Viconia: I told you, it is just the warham-

No, it's not the real Hexxat.

Hexxat: Jeez, you're a bigger stick in the mud than Keldorn sometimes.

[UNOFFICIAL] Ask Hexxat Anything

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