Superheroes logic
This idea was born on the Baldur's Gate Logic thread
So let's discuss a little Superheroes logic, for starts one of my pet peeves... How comes Superman didn't kill the Kents whe he was a child? Anyone with kids will tell you that kids just love hitting their parents. You have a kid you are sure to be kicked, punched, etc...
Now Superman is thousands if not millions of times stronger than a human. As a baby he should be strong enough to break every bone in his foster parents body. How comes they survived unscathed?
Also how comes every villain in the universe knows his secret vulnerability to kryptonite? Is it advertised on the Universal Web or what?
So let's discuss a little Superheroes logic, for starts one of my pet peeves... How comes Superman didn't kill the Kents whe he was a child? Anyone with kids will tell you that kids just love hitting their parents. You have a kid you are sure to be kicked, punched, etc...
Now Superman is thousands if not millions of times stronger than a human. As a baby he should be strong enough to break every bone in his foster parents body. How comes they survived unscathed?
Also how comes every villain in the universe knows his secret vulnerability to kryptonite? Is it advertised on the Universal Web or what?
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Comments
In a world where superheroes and supervillians both do what they please, only supercommoners stand their ground. Just ask that superwaitress over there how she kicked out one of those superheroes out of the coffee shop.
Superhero is a synonym for folks wearing embarrasing costumes. The rate of them being taken by the police for scandalisation in public space should be well over 90%.
We have the death penalty for crimes against humanity and 1st degree murder. However, super-powered villains like Magneto, who has killed many humans and tries to basically murder all humans every chance he gets, are never executed but put in super-sophisticated holding cells just waiting for somebody to inevitably bust them out. Makes sense to me!
Heroes not ever taking into account just how much collateral damage they're causing: there's fortunately been a bit of a swing back with Pixar's "The Incredibles" and Marvel in "Cap: Civil War" at this trope, but it still bugs me.
Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex
I hadn't even considered some of the pointd the author of that article makes... It just proves that in reality Superman would be a tragedy to Earth just for existing...
There was actually this rather interesting article I read once that posited that, viewed differently, Lex Luthor's attempts to bring down Superman would actually be a good thing for humanity. If Superman continues to remain good and benevolent, humanity runs the risk of becoming complacent, letting him fix all of our problems and deferring to his wishes because "he knows best for us". Ultimately, it would mean that our destiny is no longer in our own hands. Conversely, if one day Superman just got fed up with us, with our polluting and bigotry and genociding and general meanness to each other, and decided that the best way to "protect us" was to put us all under a dictatorship ruled by himself, how on Earth would we even stop him? There would be nothing we could do against an unstoppable demigod like himself.
We could always volunteer to build him a very nice palace, out of our eternal gratitude. Kal-El is so naïve he'd never notice until it was too late that we had constructed it of green or gold Kryptonite.
out of all the super heros that have ever existed, i hate super man the most, or at least everything pass lets go with 1960
in the original days when his concept was first conceived ( i want to say early 1900s? ) his powers made a bit more sense and he was a bit more practical, he couldn't fly, but he could leap over tall buildings, he wasn't able to travel relativistic speed, but could catch a flying bullet, and his strength; i believe as strong as a locomotive? so none of this lifting quintillions of lbs or kgs nonsense
now, we have a super hero who can fly ( which is really an OP super power to begin with ) can travel relativistic speed, and in some instances FASTER ( lulz, good thing comic/ super hero movie makers are terrible at physics and how they actually work ) and his strength is unfathomable, he also has super human hearing, and eye lazers and all this other OP crap, so he is basically god
oh but wait, you say, what are is mitigating factors to make him "fair"? some green rock which is made out of his planet, which coincidentally gives him ALS and in theory enough of it could kill him lol.... .what? that would be like me going to another planet that gave me super powers but if someone splashed me with a bit of earth ( so some iron/carbon/silicon perhaps? ) then i would be toast? what? wouldn't i at worse, just lose my powers and not become a compete bitc..... hmm...
plus superman is so obscene there is no point in having a justice league or other heros in the DC universe super dee dooper pooper scooper can do everything better than everyone else so there is no point in have other super heros, and plus villains are so dumb and can never seem to finish off poop scoop with krytonite, so whats the point in even having that weakness
plus physics, so with other super heros, i will let physics slide a bit ( aka marvel universe heros ) because although strong, cool, and powerful, their powers aren't exactly earth shattering, but super holmes on the other hand, with powers of that calibre, im sorry, but there is basically no baddie even darkseid or whoever could even compete with that, super wad could throw billions of punches a second ( hell even if it were only merely thousands of punches a second ) with the force of nuclear bombs ( which we found out that super wad is also immune to as long as there is the sun around lololololololol ) and if a force of that calibre can't take out your baddie, then what? throw black holes at them? blast them into a quasar? laaaaaaaame
so with that much crap going on, nope, super man is just dumb
now before i went on this rant, as i said, the original idea was better, he was basically as strong as wonder woman is now, which is way more fair, and would seem that either a hyper enhanced bullet or a nuclear bomb could actually take him out, so there would actually be stakes in his stories, and not only that, if he comes into contact with krytonite he shouldn't just curl up into the fetal position like a baby and get his ass kicked, it should actually just make him "normal" in terms of power scaling ( since this IS the stuff his planet is made out of ) unless for some hugely bizarre reason the krytonite reacts weirdly with our sun ( the source of super doops power ) and makes it so he is severely weakened? i dont know, super man sucks ass
now, actually while on this rant, i also have something to say about wonder woman; i dont like all these movies from the past, the ww2 movie of her introduction was aight, showed us how it all started and all that jazz, but the problem is, when you have a hero alive in 2017 ( which i believe is the year of batman vs super man where we are introduced to wonder woman ) and you have a movie with her taking place in 1944, there is absolutely no stakes,
you absolutely know for sure, she can't lose because she is alive 70 years later, and spoiler, she defeats her big bad boss at the end of the movie, so what is the point of this movie? see, when movies take place in the current time, there is always that chance that a super hero might perish in battle ( which does happen every ONCE in awhile ) but when you have movies take place in the past, and you know they are alive 70 years in the future? * insert long fart noise here * thats crap, unless somehow the big bad in the end wins, so then there is a purpose to continue on this story
so with the new wonder woman movie coming out, its probably going to be the exact same; wonder woman's chance of winning is 100% ( or else how was she in justice league? ) and no doubt she is going to beat the big bad enemy at the end, and some other "close friend" that she knew for 2 weeks is going to kick the can *insert fart noise once again*
i want a wonder woman movie that is either placed now adays or in the future where somehow in piss all the other heros are gone or out for the count, so then there is some actual stakes in the movie, the suspension of disbelief that she ACTUALLY has a chance to fail
see, that is the thing with super hero movies that some creators dont get; if the heros have no chance in failing in their quest, its a complete crap shoot, there should always be stakes and there should always be a way that a hero can perish, even wonder woman is kind of borderline invincible, like seriously, what in 1984 is realistically going to be a threat to her? another god perhaps? lol booooooooooring, that was used in the previous movie, i will probably still go and see it, but hmm, i no knows....
well batman was able to take him down because of kryptonite and the only reason why batman didnt kill him lol spoilers if anyone cares;
I don't think you do know that. That assumes the plot will make sense and you've already made your feelings on that pretty clear
If you want to see an extreme treatment of subverting superhero tropes, including massive dying of civilians by collateral damage and the "superheroes" being secretly power mad and even outright evil, you might enjoy "The Boys" on Amazon Prime.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07QQQ52B3/ref=dvm_us_dl_sl_go_ast_19BOY_TLe|c_375798336442_m_mdGEmHd0-dc_s__?gclid=Cj0KCQiArdLvBRCrARIsAGhB_szqZsE-0cD8e1lFbKzHyQ-OvE-oAfjGU7iqU5h1vUYRCD5IUcfL4hIaAvDQEALw_wcB
Here's the thing though, it's possible to have a character live and defeat the big bad... and still lose everything that matters. For example, the Joker in The Dark Knight. It didn't matter that we knew that we were only 2/3 of the way through the trilogy and knew Batman would survive, that was never where the tension and the stakes in the story was! But Batman still came an inch away from losing the entire city with the loss of Harvey Dent, the two ships almost blowing each other up, and the city turning against him. Most of the older Superman vs Lex Luthor stories are around this same vein... we know and Lex knows Superman's going to win... but maybe Lex can make him lose something in the process of winning.
Another example: We know that Aang in the Last Airbender is going to win his final confrontation with Ozai: the story wouldn't be satisfying without that. But the stakes aren't whether Aang is going to defeat Ozai, it's whether Aang could defeat Ozai without killing him. If Aang had killed him, he would've won... But lost almost everything that he stood for.
I would actually hazard that in the best stories, the tension should never be whether the good guy lives or dies, but what they're willing to do or sacrifice to achieve their victory.
Well if you consider some people actually believe this happens in reality (aliens, secret societies, etc.) the premise of a super advanced societuy living hidden under our noses gets even crazier
Like, it's not a documentary. They're not trying to trick you into thinking any of this stuff actually exists in the real world. It's a pretend space with like magic and stuff.
-R. R. Tolkien
This is the main thing about Smallville that I hated. There was enough Kryptonite in the town of Smallville that Clark should've been sick all the time. And there is no way that much came with is ship (or anything else that came to Smallville in the story). But there it was, conveniently there for every plot that needed it.
It also conveniently changed strength and properties regularly. Sometimes Clark couldn't move with a small chunk of it around. Other times he could be surrounded by it and still scoot until he got away from it. It could be on him and paralyze him, or it could be on him and make him mildly weakened. Whatever the plot called for, that's how strong kryptonite was. And do you need somebody to gain some power, get sick, teleport, or gain otherworldly knowledge? Well, luckily we have kryptonite! It can do everything!
Batman never killing anyone, just severely crippling them for committing armed robbery.
I am surprised one of his victims have never sued the city of Gotham and their police force for not only letting this judge, jury & executioner stalk the streets, but actively work with him.
They can't sue him because nobody is smart enough to figure out who he is. Vigilante benefits!
The city can just shrug and say, "Bat who?".
Even in less ridiculous scenarios, if you know somebody's build, demeanor, voice (even badly altered ones), you can figure it out. It isn't like adults at Halloween time can't tell who each dressed up kid is. A few good ones may have you stumped for a little bit, but enough time on your porch and you figure it out. It doesn't take years of living with somebody or fighting them.
It probably wouldn't be hard for people who know you to figure it out. Then it just depends on whether or not they can keep a secret.
The Clark Kent thing is another reason I can't stand Superman. If I was Superman I'd just say 'Hey, this is me. I have super-speed, I can fly, I have x-ray vision, I'm invulnerable, my mind operates at levels you can't comprehend, and hey, I can even time travel if I want to. If anybody fucks with my family they're dead. Period!'.
I feel like everyone should know Bruce Wayne is Batman. Who else with that physical build is rich enough to own the car, gadgets, etc.?
Batman doesn't even have much in the way of vulnerable family either. Maybe the fact that in a world of super-villains, you couldn't 'not' be Batman at any time if your identity was known is the real problem. DC was trying to make their heroes fit in with normal people.
Hawkeye has a secret identity in the MCU precisely because he has a vulnerable family. SHIELD gave him an easy way to pull it off credibly. Captain America and Winter Soldier have nobody because of their time in limbo. Iron Man and Henry Pym/Wasp are rich and can protect themselves with tech. Thor isn't from Earth (and is a God). The Hulk has no connections except for Black Widow who also has nobody. Dr. Strange isn't known to hardly anybody because of magic. Scarlet Witch and the Vision also have no family. Black Panther is from a remote country in Africa protected by advanced tech. The Guardians of the Galaxy are nomads and also have no families. Captain Marvel pretty much ditto.
The only MCU heroes with family other than Hawkeye are Ant Man and Spiderman. Ant Man already had problems related to that and it looks like Spiderman may have to deal with it in his next movie. It seems that most MCU characters don't have to worry about a secret identity due to design more than anything. Kind of brilliant on the part of Disney/Marvel if you think about it...