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someone took a picture of me on the train

typo_tillytypo_tilly Member Posts: 5,686
It was weird? I'm upset about it, although less now. Being upset is a waste of energy, but I haven't completely gotten over it. How should I let it not bother me?


So I was minding me own business, playing ninja turtles, then this middle aged woman (officewear, grey hair, in her 50s) takes a photo of my face. We're sitting right next to each other. I was taken aback, but I managed to put my system down and gave her a confused look. In response, she frantically puts her phone away then tries to stare me down (yeh... she failed, looking away for the rest of the trip).

I remained speechless. After a while, I took out my phone then took a picture of her... why? I have no idea. ('You took a picture of me, so I'm gonna take a picture of you?') She pretended not to notice. I guess if I see myself on a train pic website, I can put her picture up in response? o_O 'This is the woman who took my picture when I was playing ninja turtles.'???

I'm trying to think:
How should I have responded?
How much does this matter?
Was I doing something wrong for someone to photograph me?

If I happens again, I'm now prepared to ask if they've just taken me picture. At the very least, I could have embarrassed her by drawing attention to it.

I don't think it matters too much if my picture is distributed, because I wasn't doing anything wrong and I didn't look dishevelled or the like.

There were no elderly or disabled or pregnant people who needed seats and there were available seats.


What do you think?

JuliusBorisovSmilingSwordTeflonBlackravenNonnahswriter
«1

Comments

  • elminsterelminster Member, Developer Posts: 15,948
  • FinneousPJFinneousPJ Member Posts: 6,456
    Maybe you misjudged her action. From your story you didn't ask her, which is the weirdest part.

  • JuliusBorisovJuliusBorisov Member, Administrator, Moderator, Developer Posts: 18,865
    Hey, there's nothing wrong in taking pictures of other people. There's no harm in it, at least if you're not a media person and do something wrong ;)

  • WilburWilbur Member Posts: 1,173
    I would find that kind of offensive if someone did that to me. Some (creepy?) guy once took a photo of my wife when she walked past him in the street. She confronted him about it but he didn't admit taking a photo. He was very awkward and embarrassed though so he probably did think twice before doing it again :D

    Teflontypo_tillyNonnahswriter
  • SmilingSwordSmilingSword Member Posts: 827
    edited May 2015
    Can see both sides, from a photographers point of view in most cases a subject that doesn't know it's a subject will get you the best picture possible. But if she is a photographer she should of say so afterwards and asked if it was ok to take your picture. I would say she was probably not a real photographer, I know a few and they live for taking photos so always have their camera's with them. Getting a picture with proper perspective, lighting, etc, on a phone is a really hard thing to do.
    So I call creep, if it happens again I advise you to make a scene, or confront them.
    Old ladys are just people and therefore can be just as creepy as anybody else.

    Teflontypo_tilly
  • typo_tillytypo_tilly Member Posts: 5,686
    It was pretty strange. We were sitting right next to each other and she didn't try to hide holding the camera at my face. I was more stunned than anything. If it happens again I will speak up, but this is one of those weird moments where you can't believe it's happened and you're not sure how to react until after the fact.

    Teflon
  • TheElfTheElf Member Posts: 798
    edited May 2015
    Similar things have happened to me. Once in college a couple tourists waved me over with a camera and asked to take my picture because "you're so handsome". Maybe would've been an ego boost to other people but it really freaked me out. I had already walked over expecting to be asked to take a picture of them, and had no idea how to react so I just did it. Maybe they were on some sort of weird scavenger hunt. :neutral:
    Personally, I feel it should be illegal to just snap someone else's picture, unless you're a hired photographer at an event or something. It's mad creepy.

    Teflontypo_tilly
  • TeflonTeflon Member, Translator (NDA) Posts: 517
    On the plus side, maybe Your rugged good looks made her to took a picture of you.
    But seriously, I think that woman is definetely wrong since not apologize about violating your rights to not taken picture.
    Cheer up and hope that happen not.

    typo_tilly
  • SilverstarSilverstar Member Posts: 2,192
    Odd. Considering her behaviour in response to you reacting, I somehow doubt the picture was taken for any "professional" reason (photographer/journalist/artist etc.) and as such it's odd at best, creepy at worst.

    I'm trying to think:
    How should I have responded?
    How much does this matter?
    Was I doing something wrong for someone to photograph me?

    Simply asking "What was that all about?" would probably be the most reasonable course of action. Personally I believe firmly in eye for an eye though and would probably have taken their picture in return and maybe mumbled something like "This is going straight on the Creepy People to Look Out For site..." if I wanted to non-subtly provoke an explanation.

    How much it matters depends on you really. Though seeing as you weren't doing anything wrong or weird you don't really have much reason to fear distribution of the picture. And as SmilingSword said she's just another random person like anyone else. Random people seemingly do the most incomprehensible of things unless you know them.

    You could not have been doing anything less wrong. The Turtles are one of the best things mankind has ever thought of. As such, playing a Turtles game is a right thing to be doing. There'd be less war and crime in the world if people sat around playing Turtles games instead, particularily the amazing Turtles in Time™.

    typo_tilly
  • SethDavisSethDavis Member Posts: 1,812
    That's what you get for playing ninja turtles in the wild. Such a rare occurrence is of course gonna be photo bait. :P

    typo_tillyelminster
  • QbertQbert Member Posts: 193
    deltago said:

    And here I wss hoping to see a picture of a skunk riding a train with petrified commuters around it.

    Next time, ask her politely if she did indeed take a photo of you. Then ask why. If you do not like the reason, you are allowed to ask her to delete it.

    if she refuses, bring it up to transit security about her odd behaviour, with a description (not a photo though, that'd be hypocritical) of her and how she made you feel insecure and or your privacy violated.

    Since she didn't ask first I think I would find this a bit strange and rude, but I wouldn't call taking a picture of someone in a public area a violation of privacy. I would hope that train security would tell you so and send you on your way.

    FinneousPJtypo_tilly
  • SilverstarSilverstar Member Posts: 2,192

    Someone took a picture of you on the train. What will you do?

    I totally imagine that spoken in the voice of Socucius Ergalla.

    Kamigoroshi
  • typo_tillytypo_tilly Member Posts: 5,686
    Thanks guys.

    Mostly I feel shite for not acting proper and not politely asking her why she took my picture, especially with us sitting next to each other. Missed opportunity right? :/ But her behaviour of silently and obviously taking my picture then not saying anything about it was also wrong.

    I've done a short search and I don't see my picture posted. I probably won't ever see it.

    ... For that reason, I have to not let it get to me... stop franting over it. Someone took my picture. It probably wasn't the most flattering yet it wasn't terrible either. And it's done. I should have asked. I didn't. If there's a next time I will ask.


    I wish I had been playing Turtles in Time. I'm going through Danger of the Ooze. :3

    SethDavisTeflon
  • typo_tillytypo_tilly Member Posts: 5,686
    aww :3

    That's the perfect picture for an Asperger's skunk. :D

  • meaglothmeagloth Member Posts: 3,806
    Hmmmm. If she is a professional photographer, she's not a very good one. Even if she was trying to get a candid photo, she should have asked afterward. I know in photojournalism you can't print anything without getting permission from the subject. Maybe art is different, but in sure the same risk of lawsuit that drive journalistic regulation applies to artists as well.
    That said I also know how hard it is to get that permission from everyone. I was a photographer for our school prom, and it would have been impossible to ask everyone there, as well as very awkward. Luckily the school makes everyone sign a media release form at the beginning of the year, so I didn't have to. I did get a bunch of weird looks through, probably because my partner didn't bring me a camera so I was stuck using my iPhone.
    As for you playing it cool and asking my her politely "uh, excuse me, but what the f*ck are you doing?" Is probably the best course of action. Who knows? She could have a really good reason. No one ever got a good quest my not talking to every single character in the bar:P
    That said


    1. [Appraise] *business smile* "Thank you for your purchase! One shot costs 30 bucks. Requesting poses, or shots in special costumes, will cost extra."

    Is my go to response if this ever happens to me.

    typo_tilly
  • the_spyderthe_spyder Member Posts: 5,017
    I agree that the best possible response would have been to simply ask her why.

    At the end of the day, you really don't know why and therefore any reaction is knee-jerk at best. Maybe she thought you were cute? Maybe you looked like someone she knew? Maybe she was just trying out the camera feature on a new phone and hey presto you just happened to be there. Maybe she thought you might be a good match for someone she knew? Maybe she was on a scavenger hunt? It literally could have been any of millions of reasons that were unoffensive.

    No use getting bent out of shape about it until/unless you are actually harmed by the action in some way. Simply not understanding why is not really a cause for hatred or obnoxious behavior.

    All in my opinion.

    FinneousPJtypo_tillywraith5641dunbar
  • typo_tillytypo_tilly Member Posts: 5,686
    Yeah. Maybe she was afraid to say way? Two insecure people on the train. :(

    the_spyder
  • wraith5641wraith5641 Member Posts: 492
    Maybe she was thinking "Ha! You're a queer fellow!"

    In all seriousness, don't worry about it. You're probably in a lot more random pics than you think. I guess it's different when it's blatant, but as long as she wasn't being openly antagonistic about it, it's just a stranger you will probably never see again.

    I was in DC once during a busy period, and as I was taking pictures, I realized how many other people were taking pictures. This made me think about how many strangers could possibly have an image of me in the pics they were taking. It doesn't bother me at all because I will never know about it.

    If someone I KNEW (and by that, I mean someone that isn't my friend) purposely took a picture of me in that way, then it would be a different story. I'd wonder if they were doing it so they can say mean things about me on social media.

    typo_tillyFiendish_Warrior
  • SilverstarSilverstar Member Posts: 2,192

    Actually, the more I think about it, the more I'm 100% certain that she took your soul. I've read about these things. Not good. Not good at all.

    You're probably right.

    Fiendish_Warrior
  • deltagodeltago Member Posts: 6,838
    Qbert said:

    deltago said:

    And here I wss hoping to see a picture of a skunk riding a train with petrified commuters around it.

    Next time, ask her politely if she did indeed take a photo of you. Then ask why. If you do not like the reason, you are allowed to ask her to delete it.

    if she refuses, bring it up to transit security about her odd behaviour, with a description (not a photo though, that'd be hypocritical) of her and how she made you feel insecure and or your privacy violated.

    Since she didn't ask first I think I would find this a bit strange and rude, but I wouldn't call taking a picture of someone in a public area a violation of privacy. I would hope that train security would tell you so and send you on your way.
    Transit isn't a public area. Huge misconception a lot of people have.

  • elminsterelminster Member, Developer Posts: 15,948
    edited May 2015
    I don't think its a question of a public area. However I do think its an issue of personal space. Sticking a camera in someones face (let alone taking a picture) is a violation of personal space in my book. That doesn't mean its illegal, just rude.

    Nimran
  • elminsterelminster Member, Developer Posts: 15,948
    edited May 2015
    Obviously its not quite the same but it still reminds me of this a bit.



    typo_tillyproccoFiendish_WarriorJuliusBorisov
  • VallmyrVallmyr Member, Mobile Tester Posts: 2,368
    Psshtt if I saw you I'd take a picture too! Obviously she was enraptured by your pure adorablness! She must have been thinking, "THIS DIVINE BEAUTY BEFORE MINE EYES! I must capture it out before it fades away like the intelligence of a Mind Flayer victim!"

    Your grace simply left her speechless!

    proccoSilverstarSethDavisJuliusBorisov
  • jacobtanjacobtan Member Posts: 655
    There are times when it's useful to have powers of a beholder. Gaze of death/disintegration/fear/etc. - take your pick.

    SilverstarFiendish_WarriorJuliusBorisov
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