What are your favorite quotes, dialogs, and NPCs from the new content? (spoilers)
Tresset
Member, Moderator Posts: 8,264
Here are some of mine:
"I try to have at least three phenomenally bad ideas a day. I'm counting this place as two." ~Charname, spoken to Dragomir.
(I actually like a lot of Charname's responses in Dragomir's tomb but this is the best one.)
I like the monk that guards the bridge to the twofold temple. It is funny how subtly moronic he is. One of my favorite parts of that dialog:
Charname: "How is it someone whose skull has never known the moist, warm touch of a brain can remember to breathe?"
Monk: "What're you getting at?"
Charname: "You're not very smart, are you? Quite the opposite, in fact. You're stupid. A dunderheaded moron. An idiot. A cretin. An oaf of such staggering thick-headedness that even other oafs look at you and say, "Wow, what a dimwitted simpleton he is." You're an imbecile, a dolt, a lackwit so lacking in wits that I can feel my mind growing more sluggish and dull each passing second I talk with you. You're senseless, obtuse, laughably thick: a clodpate. In short, what I'm saying, you lethargic dullard, is that you're a brainless lout too stupid to live. Therefore, and I say this with absolutely no regret whatsoever, I am going to kill you."
Monk: "Huh?"
Charname: "Just draw your sword and die, already."
Monk: "You think I'm stupid, PRO_RACE? I'll show you stupid!"
Then there is Baeloth. He is just great. One of these days I will have to finish the Black Pits 1&2...
Wilson's dialogs are funny too:
Wilson: "Growl?"
Charname: "I am CHARNAME. What are you called?"
Wilson: "Growl. Growl growl."
Charname: "You call yourself Wilson? How pedestrian."
Wilson: "Snuffle growl."
Charname: "Forgive me. I didn't realize it was so common. To be honest, I've not had the opportunity to speak with many bears."
Neera: "Uh... You know that's a bear you're talking to, right?"
Does anyone else have any favorites in the new content?
"I try to have at least three phenomenally bad ideas a day. I'm counting this place as two." ~Charname, spoken to Dragomir.
(I actually like a lot of Charname's responses in Dragomir's tomb but this is the best one.)
I like the monk that guards the bridge to the twofold temple. It is funny how subtly moronic he is. One of my favorite parts of that dialog:
Charname: "How is it someone whose skull has never known the moist, warm touch of a brain can remember to breathe?"
Monk: "What're you getting at?"
Charname: "You're not very smart, are you? Quite the opposite, in fact. You're stupid. A dunderheaded moron. An idiot. A cretin. An oaf of such staggering thick-headedness that even other oafs look at you and say, "Wow, what a dimwitted simpleton he is." You're an imbecile, a dolt, a lackwit so lacking in wits that I can feel my mind growing more sluggish and dull each passing second I talk with you. You're senseless, obtuse, laughably thick: a clodpate. In short, what I'm saying, you lethargic dullard, is that you're a brainless lout too stupid to live. Therefore, and I say this with absolutely no regret whatsoever, I am going to kill you."
Monk: "Huh?"
Charname: "Just draw your sword and die, already."
Monk: "You think I'm stupid, PRO_RACE? I'll show you stupid!"
Then there is Baeloth. He is just great. One of these days I will have to finish the Black Pits 1&2...
Wilson's dialogs are funny too:
Wilson: "Growl?"
Charname: "I am CHARNAME. What are you called?"
Wilson: "Growl. Growl growl."
Charname: "You call yourself Wilson? How pedestrian."
Wilson: "Snuffle growl."
Charname: "Forgive me. I didn't realize it was so common. To be honest, I've not had the opportunity to speak with many bears."
Neera: "Uh... You know that's a bear you're talking to, right?"
Does anyone else have any favorites in the new content?
19
Comments
- Neera during ToB
Some of my favorites!
'My skin may not have scales, but it has seen many suns come and go. Boo thinks you could use some sun too, then you might not smell so much like wet laundry.'
'Boo points, I punch. Is very simple relationship, but it is effective.'
'After frolicking in a bush that we now consider to be of suspicious nature, both Boo and I have contracted the Calimshite Itch in rather... private places. A salve would be most joyously anticipated!'
And last but by no means least!
'Look, Boo - everyone knows now! See how his fame spreads like a scented cloud from your furry back-side when you have had one too many crackers!'
It will be even bloodier than you hoped!
I want this phrase to be added into BG2:EE so much...
Rasaad in BG1, to that would-be Dark Moon Monk in the Blade and Stars (don't wanna give away too much here)
Neera!
"EAT FLAMING - or... possibly frosty - DEATH!"
Along with the previously mentioned Dorn line from Bengoshi. Who's voice sends chills down your spine.
Charname: "He tortured and experimented on Imoen and me. He will pay for our pain a thousand times over with his own."
Dorn: "How did you allow this to happen?"
Charname: "Well, you know my love of cages and chains..."
Dorn: "You're an idiot."
With the evil character I was roleplaying, this line, just... It was too perfect. I giggled far too much.
Also, this out of Rasaad's BG1 quest:
Lol I see wat u did thar Beamdog. :P
- Neera, again from ToB
"I plan to knock on the door and politely ask them to vacate the premises. If they don't, I'll slaughter the lof of them. If they do, I'll still slaughter the lot of them."
- Player Character during Rasaad's quest in ToB
Charname: It wasn't the sight that hit me first, but the smell. Ye gods, how do people live with the stench?
Rasaad: Calimport was worse, thanks to the heat. After a time you'll no longer notice it.
Charname: Five senses is more than any sensible person needs.
Neera: "Aaaand we're going to go there, aren't we? Great. I'll just go and pack my bags. For an EXTENDED STAY. Wild mage, remember? And we're walking INTO the asylum? Ugh."
Neera and Anomen
Anomen: May I venture to guess, Neera, that you have never been courted by a proper knight?
Neera: If by "proper knight," you mean you, then no; but I've got a feeling I'm about to get a taste.
Anomen: Feeling and tasting come later, dear lady.
Neera: Oh, gross! Go away!
Anomen: Your eyes are as wild as your magic, my dear lady. I dare not gaze into their depths.
Neera: Who's daring you? Not me!
Anomen: A moment of your time, my dear lady. Excuse my dull and graceless talk, but—
Neera: Okay, you're excused. That it?
Anomen: I would ask a boon of you.
Neera: Please don't, Anomen.
Anomen: There! You have granted my boon without even knowing it. To hear my name upon your lips was all I desired.
Neera: Great. I hate having syllables on my chin.
Anomen: My dear lady—
Neera: You know, every time you call me that, I imagine myself with antlers.
Anomen: Then as your roebuck, I will chase you, Deer Lady, and make you pant in the soft grass.
Neera: What? You want pants made of soft grass? This is getting so weird, Anomen.
Anomen: My dear lady—
Neera: WHAT?!
Anomen: I have courted you a long while, and you have resisted my best efforts. Now I invoke the privilege of an earnest lover, the naturally yielding nature of woman, and the equally natural dauntlessness of man. How can I fail with such powers behind me? The time has come. Let me enjoy the sugar upon your lips.
Neera: Bloody hells. If it'll give me some peace and quiet, I'll give you what you're asking for.
Anomen: Truly?
Neera: Yes. All you had to do was be a little bold. I like my men—manly, I guess, or whatever it is you were being. I'll come to you when no one's looking.
Neera: Here you go-
Anomen: What's this?!
Neera: I was resistant at first, I'll admit, but once you brought it up, I couldn't stop fantasizing!
Anomen: You—! But I—
Neera: Do you want me to tell you what I imagined first? Shortbread biscuits with strawberry preserves! I know, I know. Not that creative—but so delicious! Then I thought about glazed pears, mincemeat pies, puddings, gingerbread...
Anomen: But this sack! It's—
Neera: Yes! A pound of sugar from Waukeen's Promenade. As promised. Get cooking!
(some party responses)
Jaheira: Anomen! I am almost embarrassed to request marzipan; it is so excessively sweet. But I do like it.
Imoen: Heya, Anomen! Taffy is good! Plain old taffy.
Aerie: Does liking shortbread seem too obvious, Anomen? Because I do! It seems hard to make... Good luck!
Viconia: I hate sweets, but...hmm. Candied violets with anise seeds are not bad. Make me some, human.
Mazzy: I would be no halfling if I didn't like cakes of all sorts. Bake me a seed cake, Anomen, and I swear I will be your stalwart sister-in-arms.
Nalia: Oh, Anomen! I'd love some sweet spiced wine. Our cellars were full of wine from the Vilhon Reach that our cooks would make into the most delicious concoctions...
Hexxat: Lean in, Anomen. Blood and sugar are surprisingly complementary.
Viconia: I dislike you, half-elf. Your shrill voice, your grating humor, and your childish thinking offend me.
Neera: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that . . . ? Wait, What . . . what is that smell?
Viconia: I smell nothing.
Neera: By the gods, what IS that? Oh, wait, Viconia. It's just you. For a moment I thought Charname had picked up a powerful cheese while I wasn't looking.
Viconia: You are ridiculous. Were it not for Charname, you would be dead.* I do not smell like cheese.
Neera: It's not bad, just a little pungent. Maybe you picked up the scent when you still worshipped Lolth? They say she lives in the Demonweb Pits. A place with that kind of name probably doesn't smell very pleasant.
Viconia: Be glad I do not still follow Lolth; if I did, you would be dying a painful death right now.
Neera: All right, Viconia, let me be direct for a second. You like directness, right? You started this conversation, and you started it by insulting me. "I dislike you." That's what you said. Do you really think people will listen to anything you have to say when you talk to them like that? You called me childish. Is it less childish to threaten me? Yeah, really reasonable and adult.
Viconia: This conversation is over.
Neera: Good. Because you smell, and the smell is only getting stronger.
______________
* Look who's talking.
Yep, I'm glad I went with Rasaad instead; Neera can have him, lol.
[spoiler] Also one of Edwin's battle cries when he's a woman:
"I feel your stares! Die! Die!"
Protagonist: It's a name.
Dorn: A pirate?
Imoen: I can just see it now. "Arrr, me crewmen, burninate all the towns, in the name of me patron!"
Dorn: Scouring coasts, burning, destroying, and pillaging all I come across?
Imoen: Yeah!
Dorn: No. Do not speak to me again.
(charname to Rasaad when they killed his brother)
Died when I read that, damn now I have to do that quest again...
Charname: WE will take our rightful place as a power in the realms.
Dorn: Of course.
Dorn: How do you feel?
Charname: A little peckish. I could use a sandwich right about now.
Dorn: What?! I give you my love and devotion, and this is how you repay me? If you will not share your power with me, Charname, I will take it!
(turns red and attacks)
Jeez, Dorn, I would have shared the sandwich.