Ok. Time to close this thread. We're no longer subject to the whims of those handing out cookies, @Shandyr went ahead and built us an automated cookie dispenser.
*Chanters sing in the background, bells ring and cookies slowly fall from the sky. Shandyr returns from a long and hard journey home to the cookie kingdom. He waits in front of the throne room, he stretches out his arm and opens his palm, a single cookie falls into Shandyr's hand. Shandyr crushes the cookie and drops it to the floor. He enters the throne room and faces... Nimran...*
"You no longer need to sacrifice for your people. You no longer need to bear the weight of your cookie crown, Nimran. I've taken care of everything."
*Shandyr advances on the throne and grabs Nimran.*
"What is this, Shandyr? What are you doing?"
"Succeeding you, Nimran. Your cookie kingdom shall crumble, and from the ashes shall arise a new order that will shake the very foundations of the cookie world! My Cookie Dispenser will be YOUR UNDOING! Fresh and new cookies at any time of the day with a new flavor! Your reign ends here and now!"
You realise that the cookie kingdom is just a plywood movie set that we used for the ferret christmas panto right?
*Chanters sing in the background, bells ring and cookies slowly fall from the sky. Shandyr returns from a long and hard journey home to the cookie kingdom. He waits in front of the throne room, he stretches out his arm and opens his palm, a single cookie falls into Shandyr's hand. Shandyr crushes the cookie and drops it to the floor. He enters the throne room and faces... Nimran...*
"You no longer need to sacrifice for your people. You no longer need to bear the weight of your cookie crown, Nimran. I've taken care of everything."
*Shandyr advances on the throne and grabs Nimran.*
"What is this, Shandyr? What are you doing?"
"Succeeding you, Nimran. Your cookie kingdom shall crumble, and from the ashes shall arise a new order that will shake the very foundations of the cookie world! My Cookie Dispenser will be YOUR UNDOING! Fresh and new cookies at any time of the day with a new flavor! Your reign ends here and now!"
Pffft, please...
Nothing, and I mean NOTHING, beats the feeling of receiving a warm, freshly baked from a Ferret with an insatiable love and care for the art. Your soulless machine can NEVER replace that.
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I declare myself first in line for seconds; even if the cookies are filled with delicious chocolate chip tracking devices.
[#FightThePower]
It's good to have the option of a self-service cookie jar, even if it has more bylaws than a house of parliament.
Nothing, and I mean NOTHING, beats the feeling of receiving a warm, freshly baked