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The topic for unhappiness/vent your sorrow

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  • Kitteh_On_A_CloudKitteh_On_A_Cloud Member Posts: 1,629
    Well, that comic I previously was whining about has reached a new low. It basically introduced child rape in a mockingly lighthearted way. I'm really disturbed by it. I've got the feeling this comic just shows the perverse things the audience wants to see, and that it's no longer about any good interesting content anymore. Ironically enough, the comic's site has a NFSW part to it, why not keep such creepy things there, I wonder? This really has gotten me down. I know it's such a silly and stupid thing compared to the grave things posted earlier here (my apologies to @booinyoureyes), but this has really gotten me to the point of crying. I think I'll stop reading that mess. It's just... I don't even know how to write it down... I guess disheartening would be a good term.

    Really...just...I wish people, and especially artists, would stop throwing child abuse and rape around so lightheartedly in hopes of it making their comic more 'interesting'...

    *deep sigh*
  • booinyoureyesbooinyoureyes Member Posts: 6,164
    edited April 2014
    @Kitteh_On_A_Cloud‌ I totally agree with you about art these days being too reliant on shock-value. It is a bad trend in television these days, and I find it a cheap ploy to bring attention to a piece of work. One of my favorite shows (and pretty much the only comedy I enjoy) is South Park, which has always employed this kind of device. It still managed to do more than simply shock and disgust, but I never enjoyed that aspect other than the few occasions it was used to make a particularly poignant point.

    The real problem is when it is used in serious works. I am one of the few who think that the Starz series Spartacus would have been better off with less depictions of over the top cartoonish gore and brutality . I totally agree with you on things like child abuse and rape being used liberally in many things these days in order to make them more 'interesting' as you put it. Of course these are serious issues, but there comes a point where the over the top depiction of it cheapens its use as a plot device to create drama.

    I am absolutely not advocating for censorship, but I do think that over-the-top brutality has diminished as a literary contrivance.
    Post edited by booinyoureyes on
  • iuventasiuventas Member Posts: 95
    Venting concerns lost friends as well as my love life (or current lack thereof). It might not be the best idea to share this stuff with lots of strangers on the internet, but what the hell, I don't think I care right now.

    I just miss them - horribly so. The angels on my shoulder, the only two men in my life who never ever let me down. Just friends, sure, I had this huge childish crush on Michaś (and he seems to have set my standards for men in stone, who wouldn't love a tall ginger... which, in a way, also gave me a lot of trouble later).
    Gods, it's been over four years, losing two best friends in one day was a lot to handle for someone not even 16 years old. It still seems I lost everything together with them, all the things that made me, made us. I was like their little sister, they made every effort to keep me safe. The only way my parents would let me out at night, to a party or anywhere was dragging them along.
    And then they were gone, just like that.
    Sometimes I regret not being with them that day.

    Long story short, without them I landed in much worse places, made friends with worst people possible and discovered that not all men are like them. Hell, I managed to never notice I dated someone addicted to drugs. Had him ask for change at a bus stop some time ago. Terrifying stuff...
    Not all handsome, tall redheads are Michaś, either.
    What made me think about that? Well, I saw someone I was with for quite a bit of time being an absolute piece of shit (as usual) on the Internet. How could I be completely smitten with him - no idea, but either a lot of sanitizer or boiling water are the only things that come to my mind when I think of him coming close to me any time again.

    Also I'll have to come back to the city where I study on Sunday. I love my studies, but I can only afford to rent a room with a certain family.
    They constantly yell. At their daughter, at each other, at the dog.
    Yell right next to the door to my room.
    Yell downstairs.
    Yell, yell, yell.
    My family may not be the best in the world (yay being called looney by mother, not that I disagree, though), but at least conflicts are resolved in a calm manner.
    My fathers slow and calm tone is one of the most chilling things in the world, but at least it's not YELLING.

    At least I managed to get into my dream study field and see a bit of light from the hellhole my life was for some time and make friends that aren't completely destructive for my mental health.
  • BelgarathMTHBelgarathMTH Member Posts: 5,653
    edited April 2014
    @iuventas, I'm sorry for your losses and pain, and I wish you well. I think that many of the friends I have met on this forum will have very insightful advice and feedback to offer you, if you desire it.

    I have a bit of a sorrow of my own. There was a post made here recently by some Australian dudes, with a humorous multiplayer run through BG:EE that they wanted us to watch, and that video contained a whole lot of racial slurs against Asians, as well as one use of the "N" word.

    I engaged the dude who posted it in a dialogue. I told him that, while I had laughed at the humor in the video, I was very concerned about the anti-Asian racism in it.

    He was quite reasonable, and willing to talk to me. He explained some things about Australian culture that lessened my concerns a bit.

    Meanwhile, other posters were evaluating the whole spiel, and basically taking his side, while telling me in a well-meaning and friendly manner that I was taking the matter far too seriously, and that I should forget the whole thing.

    But, at the same time as I was posting my concerns about this video, someone came in and said that she had been raped by a similar group, who were throwing anti-Asian slurs at her during the act.

    I missed the impact of that, at first. Honestly, I had scanned her first response without really seeing it, since that OP and I were in the middle of typing our responses and digesting them, give or take 24 hours.

    The OP responded to me with great sympathy and reason, and told the rape victim to F*** off.

    I still didn't grasp the impact of that until she reposted and quietly said once again that she had been raped, that she didn't want to make a big deal about that in a game forum, but that if she didn't speak up, then no one would.

    Meanwhile, all other posters were singing variations on the theme of "it's no big deal, let it go, the video was funny, if you call it racist, then *you're* a racist."

    I totally lost it. As in, enraged, adrenaline-pumped, *lost it*.

    I typed a couple of terse comments through tears in eyes and gritted teeth, and summoned @Dee, asking for an official ruling, and I felt like I was trying to defend a rape victim, even though she herself has never spoken to me, and likely does not appreciate my presumption.

    The judgment was to close the thread, as I had asked, and to ban the poster of that video, which I had not asked, especially given that he had behaved with sympathy and reason towards me.

    Why can't we all just get along? If a person makes a joke, and someone else says "That hurt me!", then why can't the joker just say "I'm sorry, I withdraw the joke. I won't do that again." My experience is that all jokers everywhere do not do that, but rather, they attack the hurt one, and try to hurt them even *more* deeply. What's up with that?

    The entire incident is still haunting me, to the point where I am close to concluding that I should limit my interaction on this forum to gaming related posts only, and never, ever get personal about anything.

    Our mutual love of the Baldur's Gate and other games, over time, and a lot of fun posting, can start to give us the illusion that anybody here gives a rat's patootie about our personal thoughts, feelings, or problems. And, at worst, it can lead to a person bearing their heart and soul, so to speak, and getting destroyed for it.

    So, um, yeah. If you read what I had to say, thank you for bearing with me. If nothing else, it felt good to get my sad feelings off my chest, which is, I suppose, what this thread is for.
  • DungeonnoobDungeonnoob Member Posts: 315
    @iuventas

    Its strange how the world can fall apart when you lose someone you love,happened to me to.
    I said screw this world and all in it,even throwed some curses elsewhere to.I didn't care about anything anymore and got some *friends* in the grey area who then again took me to darker places.
    It took about 4 years of my life to realize how meaningless this path was,and i decided to get the hell out
    of there.Nearly lost myself,my life and i almost got burned out in process.But i got out and no darkling can ever fool me again exept for CrevsDaak and Meagloth,i like their plots and schemes;)
  • NWN_babaYagaNWN_babaYaga Member Posts: 732
    edited May 2014
    I´m troubled atm because i have many ideas that i would like to work on mod related but my motivation is like 0 at the same time. I think about this and that but i cant make any "move" to actualy discipine myself to DO something and stop thinking or writing about. Thats a strange feeling because I know myself well enough that whenever i start on something i DO it until i´m so exhausted i need to work on something different for the next week or so. Maybe i´m just getting older and I´m angry that i never made it in the biz. But on the other hand i appreciate the freedom of creativity you have when you work on YOUR own stuff instead being only a part of some project that is not what you realy want to work for.. Well, that is a good problem to have right ;)
  • Kitteh_On_A_CloudKitteh_On_A_Cloud Member Posts: 1,629

    Hey guys,
    I have read here that a lot of you say that you watch the news and get depressed about how bad the world has become. Well, on another thread we were discussing my favorite news personality John Stossel. He is known for using contrarianism to explore topics, and he recently made a great piece on his show about how the world is getting better.

    He highlights how the news media reports disaster simply because it is newsworthy, while success if often not talked about because it is not as surprising (for example, he says how a plane crash is news but the fact that hundreds of planes land safely every hour is a miracle that would have been unheard of just 90 years ago).

    Aside from the fact that tragedy and despair is reported because *success is so mundane*, you should have many reasons to be optimistic about the state of the world. I know that medical technology has gone through the roof these days, and Stossel highlights the case in which a deaf woman was able to hear sound for the first time in her life. Helping people with their vision has progressed even faster (my alma mater leads the way in that department, woo woot!). Aside from that, hunger has been mostly eradicated and people are far less likely to go to war nowadays than they were during past generations. Pollution is at record lows in developed countries, and carbon emissions are lower than they have been since the mid 90s

    People always seem to complain about today's world and clamor for the "Good Old Days", but I think we often lose sight of the context. We are far better off than our parents were and they were far better off than their parents were. The world is a more tolerant, just, environmentally clean and peaceful place than ever before.

    Its hard to watch the news and realize how good things are, and I struggle with it too (this Santa Barbara shooting has gotten me a bit blue), but its there.

    I think you guys should check the Stossel program "The Good NEW Days"
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSPbMJXumbI

    I would especially concentrate on the parts about poverty reduction and technology around the 23 minute mark (my favorite topic)

    Another interesting part is the part about gay rights, guns and Ellen DeGeneres at the 30 minute mark

    About 200 school girls have been kidnapped in Nigeria, possibly raped and sold as sex slaves, and converted to extremist islamic views. So far, there's been about no help for these people who had their daughters taken from them. There's still war in Syria, victims every day. There are still issues going on in Ukraine. An Iranian woman got stoned to death because she refused to marry her nephew (incest, hooray) and married the love of her life instead. Young teenage celebs are getting more and more out of control every day (look at what's happening with Justin Bieber, formerly a sweet boy, and Miley Cyrus, previously a girl with potential, both wasting away). My own country's still run by socialists who'd sell their mom to keep their precious royally paid little job, and who keep importing poor migrants and their families, undermining our social security. But indeed, let's cheer for the fact that gays can still have their 'pride parades'... Don't mind me, maybe I'm just cynical.
  • CrevsDaakCrevsDaak Member Posts: 7,155

    (look at what's happening with Justin Bieber, formerly a sweet boy, and Miley Cyrus, previously a girl with potential, both wasting away)

    Well, that happens since the sixties :P but yeah, in those time even if they died aged 27 they made much better music.
    About the other stuff you mentioned... Someone said, some time ago "the world never was and never will be perfect."
  • meaglothmeagloth Member Posts: 3,806
    edited May 2014

    Hey guys,
    I have read here that a lot of you say that you watch the news and get depressed about how bad the world has become. Well, on another thread we were discussing my favorite news personality John Stossel. He is known for using contrarianism to explore topics, and he recently made a great piece on his show about how the world is getting better.

    He highlights how the news media reports disaster simply because it is newsworthy, while success if often not talked about because it is not as surprising (for example, he says how a plane crash is news but the fact that hundreds of planes land safely every hour is a miracle that would have been unheard of just 90 years ago).

    Aside from the fact that tragedy and despair is reported because *success is so mundane*, you should have many reasons to be optimistic about the state of the world. I know that medical technology has gone through the roof these days, and Stossel highlights the case in which a deaf woman was able to hear sound for the first time in her life. Helping people with their vision has progressed even faster (my alma mater leads the way in that department, woo woot!). Aside from that, hunger has been mostly eradicated and people are far less likely to go to war nowadays than they were during past generations. Pollution is at record lows in developed countries, and carbon emissions are lower than they have been since the mid 90s

    People always seem to complain about today's world and clamor for the "Good Old Days", but I think we often lose sight of the context. We are far better off than our parents were and they were far better off than their parents were. The world is a more tolerant, just, environmentally clean and peaceful place than ever before.

    Its hard to watch the news and realize how good things are, and I struggle with it too (this Santa Barbara shooting has gotten me a bit blue), but its there.

    I think you guys should check the Stossel program "The Good NEW Days"
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSPbMJXumbI

    I would especially concentrate on the parts about poverty reduction and technology around the 23 minute mark (my favorite topic)

    Another interesting part is the part about gay rights, guns and Ellen DeGeneres at the 30 minute mark

    About 200 school girls have been kidnapped in Nigeria, possibly raped and sold as sex slaves, and converted to extremist islamic views. So far, there's been about no help for these people who had their daughters taken from them. There's still war in Syria, victims every day. There are still issues going on in Ukraine. An Iranian woman got stoned to death because she refused to marry her nephew (incest, hooray) and married the love of her life instead. Young teenage celebs are getting more and more out of control every day (look at what's happening with Justin Bieber, formerly a sweet boy, and Miley Cyrus, previously a girl with potential, both wasting away). My own country's still run by socialists who'd sell their mom to keep their precious royally paid little job, and who keep importing poor migrants and their families, undermining our social security. But indeed, let's cheer for the fact that gays can still have their 'pride parades'... Don't mind me, maybe I'm just cynical.
    Yes. This is all important and newsworthy. 200 years ago it was commonplace.* Now tell me the world is getting worse.


    *oversimplification, but whatever. You know what I mean
  • AlmateriaAlmateria Member Posts: 257
    There is no cure for polio, it's a viral disease. And with the resurgence of anti-vaccers it's going to come back soon
  • meaglothmeagloth Member Posts: 3,806
    Almateria said:

    There is no cure for polio, it's a viral disease. And with the resurgence of anti-vaccers it's going to come back soon

    Ohhhh.... Those people.......
  • GodGod Member Posts: 1,150
    @BelgarathMTH

    [...] Why can't we all just get along? [...]

    Because you cannot. And will not. It is as simple as that. If you feed a cat through its arse, will it defecate through its mouth? In most cases, it will not.
    Apologies for the imagery of the cat micro-parable; I was going to give you a more extensive lecture on the nature of the universe again but, on second thoughts, I might just as well refer you to Genesis, chapter eleven, verses one to nine. The marginal result is cognate, anyway.
    I believe you will find understanding.
    Probably not today. Likely not in a decade. But, eventually, you will.
  • SirK8SirK8 Member Posts: 527
    edited May 2014
    God said:


    If you feed a cat through its arse, will it defecate through its mouth? In most cases, it will not.

    I think Cartman has something to say about that...

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EUovlcnnAC0
  • CrevsDaakCrevsDaak Member Posts: 7,155
    Just throwing some light over darkness...

    The Soviet Union fell.

    Do you have something against the soviets? :P I would say that they ended their communist reign with political change named Glasnost (that was after an economical change named Perestroika), so the two-sided world ended and the global process of globalization (redundant, I know) started (aka everyone turned capitalist).

    Cures have been found for deadly diseases like Tetanus, Polio, Diphtheria.

    Funny Random Fact of the Day: The first vaccine for Diphtheria, that was found around 1900, introduced Tetanus XD
    Almateria said:

    There is no cure for polio, it's a viral disease. And with the resurgence of anti-vaccers it's going to come back soon

    SURE, but COMPLETELY SURE!!! HUMANITY IS GOING TO END, KILLED BY POLIO!! D:
    ....
    Polio? Really?
    ....
    With the hygiene most countries have nowadays, and it's percentage of really being affective over the organism (IIRC lower than 20%), unless you go picking up someone with polio's shit in the street (and then touching your mouth later), it's really difficult to catch polio. I'm not talking about other countries with less resources, I never lived in one and thus can't speak for them. And that is if you don't have the vaccine.
  • Kitteh_On_A_CloudKitteh_On_A_Cloud Member Posts: 1,629
    edited June 2014
    So, according to some, the world's getting better. According to what I read daily, it's the opposite.

    Recently a well-known child murderer in my country was allowed to have sex with his girlfriend during meeting hours in prison. Now the girlfriend apparently is, of course, pregnant. She's pregnant with the baby of a child murderer. A guy who shot a child of two years old and her caretaker in broad daylight. A guy who afterwards went on a killing frenzy of people with another skin colour. I think he killed about 10 people. Randomly. Because they simply had another skin colour. This child murderer is simply allowed by the authorities to have sex with his girlfriend and get her pregnant. There even were condoms available. This future child will be forever stained by his/her dad's crimes. How is that guy, such a monster, allowed to reproduce anymore? And what kind of girl with a sane mind would still want to have sex with a murderer? Her environment even agreed positively. She doesn't even get fired. Were I her employer, I'd be disgusted and never want to see her filthy face in my company again. Because what she did was utterly selfish and with no moment's thought about the future of her child. This child will be like a bird of prey the moment his/her classmates get to know his or her past, the fact that his/her father is that one well-known child murderer.

    I also read that in a country close to mine, the murderer of a well-known and famous politician got freed. He gets more security to assure his safety, than this murdered politician ever got.

    Really, you guys might say what you want, but in my eyes, justice just doesn't exist anymore in this world. I'm getting the impression that scum gets pandered to more and more. For what reasons, I have no clue. But it's safe to say that the world's gone bollocks.

    On a more personal note: my mom arranged a psychiater for me. On my birthday. For what reason, I have no clue either. I consider myself completely sane. I never did something wrong. I've only been feeling depressed as off lately, and it's more because of my situation at home. I have to go to a psychiatrist because I am not the person my mom would want me to be. I'm turning 24 tomorrow, and I still get comments on what I say, what I wear, what I do. As if I'm still a little kid. And whenever I dare tell my parents what possibly could worry me, I get mocked. My mom forces me to do things I don't want, she still thinks she can plan my life for me, and I'm getting fed up with it. It's one of the negative sides of being forced to stay living at home because of lacking a degree and an independent income. Anyway, I got a student job in August. It's shitty, and most of what I earn, I won't be able to keep, but at least it's the first step on the way of what I hope will finally be freedom and independence.

    Sorry for the wall of text. Just had to throw it out there.

    I'm looking less and less forward to having my birthday each year. It gets shittier as the years pass by.
  • O_BruceO_Bruce Member Posts: 2,790
    @Kitteh_On_A_Cloud‌
    I can do hardly anything besides just letting you know that I have reviewed what you wrote. But I also personally think that it's better to let the prisoner to have sex with his girlfriend than to risk him raping other prisoners. Even if you say they deserve it, remember that there is a difference between justice and vengeance. You are not a criminal, you are different from them!

    Your mom apparently does not know the difference between psychiater and psychologist... I don't think you're insane, there is nothing that indicates that. You just seem to be a very sensitive person in my eyes. It's not necessary bad. If I could recommend anything psychologist-related it would be a family therapy, because it's not like you are the issue and it is a chance that something will change for the better. General relations in your family seem to be the problem and I seriously doubt you're the source. If parents think they can direct the life of an adult child, then there is something wrong wrong, as it's not the norm in the society. Probably the problem is more complicated than it appears at the first glance.

    Anyway, I don't know how important the support from someone like me could help you, but I hope I did even a little.
  • meaglothmeagloth Member Posts: 3,806
    *Oh, German word, ok.* yea, I know a lot of people that go to (or should go to) a psychiatrist. There's nothing wrong with it. In fact, it's pretty standard for an upperclass family to go to one, or at least a therapist(same?) whenever they're under just a little stress. Sometimes(not always) I think it's a bit of a status sympmbol(correct me if I'm wrong about that) it's certainly doesn't mean you've gone Tiax. @Kitteh_On_A_Cloud‌
    And about birthdays.... Yea. That happens. Birthdays are hit and miss if your lucky, pretty much past year 10-12.
  • O_BruceO_Bruce Member Posts: 2,790
    TJ_Hooker said:


    Seeing a psychiatrist doesn't mean you're insane, or that you've done anything wrong. In fact, I'd say that depression is a pretty common reason to see a psychiatrist.

    True, but I think you mean seeing psychologist, not a psychiatrist. There is difference.
  • TJ_HookerTJ_Hooker Member Posts: 2,438

    TJ_Hooker said:


    Seeing a psychiatrist doesn't mean you're insane, or that you've done anything wrong. In fact, I'd say that depression is a pretty common reason to see a psychiatrist.

    True, but I think you mean seeing psychologist, not a psychiatrist. There is difference.
    Yes, I realize that there is a difference. But psychiatrists aren't reserved for insane people. As far as I know, there is no categorical difference in the kind of people psychiatrists and psychologists treat. They just differ in their approach to treatment (and their educational background). Whether you're seeing a psychologist or a psychiatrist, it's nothing to be ashamed of.
  • O_BruceO_Bruce Member Posts: 2,790
    @TJ_Hooker‌
    Yep, and the approach is the reason why I advise to seek psychologist before seeking psychiatrist. I think that would be safer for patient/client than other way around.

    But there are also cases where psychologist and psychiatrists are working together. For example, some form of therapies can be used to enhance the effects (or, to prevent/minimalize side-effects) of more clinical-like treatment.
  • mlnevesemlnevese Member, Moderator Posts: 10,214
    TJ_Hooker said:

    TJ_Hooker said:


    Seeing a psychiatrist doesn't mean you're insane, or that you've done anything wrong. In fact, I'd say that depression is a pretty common reason to see a psychiatrist.

    True, but I think you mean seeing psychologist, not a psychiatrist. There is difference.
    Yes, I realize that there is a difference. But psychiatrists aren't reserved for insane people. As far as I know, there is no categorical difference in the kind of people psychiatrists and psychologists treat. They just differ in their approach to treatment (and their educational background). Whether you're seeing a psychologist or a psychiatrist, it's nothing to be ashamed of.
    Actually there is a basic difference. If you have any mental disorder that requires a prescription you need to see a psychiatrist as a psychologist can not prescribe any medication.
  • TJ_HookerTJ_Hooker Member Posts: 2,438
    edited June 2014
    mlnevese said:

    TJ_Hooker said:

    TJ_Hooker said:


    Seeing a psychiatrist doesn't mean you're insane, or that you've done anything wrong. In fact, I'd say that depression is a pretty common reason to see a psychiatrist.

    True, but I think you mean seeing psychologist, not a psychiatrist. There is difference.
    Yes, I realize that there is a difference. But psychiatrists aren't reserved for insane people. As far as I know, there is no categorical difference in the kind of people psychiatrists and psychologists treat. They just differ in their approach to treatment (and their educational background). Whether you're seeing a psychologist or a psychiatrist, it's nothing to be ashamed of.
    Actually there is a basic difference. If you have any mental disorder that requires a prescription you need to see a psychiatrist as a psychologist can not prescribe any medication.
    Yeah, that's part of what I meant in when I said they differ in their approach to treatment. However, it isn't strictly true that you need to see a psychiatrist in that situation, at least not here in Canada. In my case I saw a psychologist who, after several sessions, recommended a type of medication to me. I was then able to go to a regular physician with that recommendation and obtain a prescription.
  • booinyoureyesbooinyoureyes Member Posts: 6,164
    edited June 2014
    The difference is pretty simple. Psychiatrists are physicians, psychologists are not. My mom actually has 2 masters and a Ph.D in psychology... but has never practiced, lol.
    What mlnevese said was correct.
    Again, seeing either of them does not mean you are "crazy".
  • Son_of_ImoenSon_of_Imoen Member Posts: 1,806
    There's a difference between having a mental illness and being 'insane'. I wouldn't even know what the last word means. Lots of people who are considered 'insane' just have mental problems that are completely understandable if you look at it from the inside out, while people with high status in society who are considered normal often act insane. Ever heard about corporate psychopaths? People without empathy, who don't care about the well-being of others, function the best in the higher echolons of companies, that disregard the environment, both human and nature. And do lot of damage that way. Caring only about the money, now that is insane.

    As for @Kitteh_On_A_Cloud's situation, there seems to be more going on in your family than your mother wants to see: forcing a daughter to see a psychiatrist when she herself is behaving disfunctional by trying to control the life of a 24-year old adult, seems like a way to put the burden of well, disfunctionality, away from herself and like Zelgadis said, the best outcome would be for a psychologist who is trained in system-therapy, family-relations or however you want to name it, to look at the whole family, the 'system' as it's called in the psychology jargon.
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