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D&D Stats Explained with Tomatos

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Comments

  • BelgarathMTHBelgarathMTH Member Posts: 5,409
    *I* am Silke, tomato extraordinaire!

    (sung to Mr. Rogers tune) It's a glorious day in the tomato garden!

    Life is tomatoes!

    I think that I shall never see, a poem as lovely as a tomato garden.

    Yesss, Sir Tomato Gardener!

    Brave, brave, Sir Tomato, Sir Tomato saved the day! Brave, brave Sir Tomato, Sir Tomato ran away!

    NonnahswriterMontresor_SPJuliusBorisov
  • Abi_DalzimAbi_Dalzim Member Posts: 1,410
    Plant a tomato in your innards, I will!

    Tomatoes shall be swift and final!

    In the name of tomatoes, we fight!

    Tomatoes may be blind, but I'm not!

    I can dance on the head of a tomato, as well!

    I think all of the creative ones have been done already. Ah well.

    NonnahswriterBelgarathMTHMontresor_SPJuliusBorisov
  • JaceJace Member Posts: 193
    We need more tomatofied Xan quotes!

    The majesty of the tomato makes me feel insignificant.
    The sun shines and I'm amazed we live to me another tomato.
    It seems our resident suicide tomato Ajantis lives in a black and white world.
    Do you know how hollow your tomatoes sound, Ajantis?
    Perhaps, Eldoth, you could be a little more polite to our tomatoes?
    Eldoth, could you stand away from me, your tomato is somewhat unnerving!
    You could do us all a favour, Eldoth, by getting killed by the next tomato.
    I would grieve for Eldoth, if it were not for the sense of tomato I now feel.

    lolienMontresor_SPNonnahswriterJuliusBorisov
  • meaglothmeagloth Member Posts: 3,806


    So I kicked 'im in th' tomato 'til he was dead! hehehe

    I don't think you comprehend the true meaning of this phrase.

    Montresor_SPlolienJuliusBorisovGrum
  • DragonspearDragonspear Member Posts: 1,823
    edited November 2014
    @BelgarathMTH

    Icewind Dale voice sets:

    A little fire and tomatoes should liven things up!

    A little fried green tomatoes should liven things up. FTFY

    lolienJuliusBorisovwubbleGrum
  • JuliusBorisovJuliusBorisov Member, Administrator, Moderator, Developer Posts: 19,422

    "I... I do not remember your tomatoes, Ellesime."

    Do ya wanna tell me a story 'bout tomatoes and cucumbers? Please?

    lolienMontresor_SPBelgarathMTHNonnahswriter
  • NimranNimran Member Posts: 4,848
    Don't touch me, I'm super tomatoes.
    Prepare to meet your tomatoes! Hee hee hee hee hee hee hee!

    lolienMontresor_SPNonnahswriterJuliusBorisov
  • JuliusBorisovJuliusBorisov Member, Administrator, Moderator, Developer Posts: 19,422
    What can change a nature of a tomato?

    - a knife
    - spices
    - ketchup
    - pesticides
    - GMOs
    - drought
    - expiration dates
    - a man (a woman)
    - nothing
    - it's you, Gorion, a long-time tomato admirer

    lolienelminsterMontresor_SPNonnahswriter
  • elminsterelminster Member, Developer Posts: 15,958
    More Elminster Tomato Quotes

    Perhaps not common knowledge, but every tomato is plain for those that know where to look. As it is, I am aware of thine tomato's efforts and accomplishments. Thou tomato art quite adept, as Gorion predicted. All that remains is to determine motive.

    'Twas neither the place nor the time for such things. As painful as the circumstances may have been, it was time for thee to forge thine own path. One of the most valuable lessons that life has taught me is when NOT to go sticking my tomato in other people's affairs. Such is the case now as well.

    I fear I cannot. Self discovery is best left to the self, and all thy questions will be answered in time. I will offer a small tomato of information, though thou hast likely heard the same from another source already. The bandits that thou dost seek make a habit of traveling in the northeast. A search in that direction will no doubt yield fruitful results. With this, I shall take my leave.

    It is a questionable mind that disregards a tomato's voice, regardless of how nebulous the advice. Nevertheless, I shall say my piece in plain words and leaf. The bandits that thou dost seek make a habit of traveling in the northeast. Fare thee well.

    I am unsure, however, whether the distasteful road that thou hast chosen is the result of a sadistic humor, or just the path of least resistance. If thou must indulge thy tomato instincts, at least be sure that they do not take total control. This would be especially dangerous for thee. I will impart one piece of information before I go, though 'tis hardly a surprise, I am sure. The bandits that thou dost seek make a habit of traveling in the northeast. With this, I shall take my leave.

    JuliusBorisovlolienNonnahswriter
  • OzzyBotkinsOzzyBotkins Member Posts: 396
    Edwin: Give me 2000 tomatoes and a pointy hat and I will kick his arse

    lolienNonnahswriter
  • NimranNimran Member Posts: 4,848
    TOMATO ME! TOMATO THE NEW LORD OF MURDER!
    To end...like tomatoes?!
    Greetings CHARNAME, I am Melissan, a tomato.
    Life...is tomatoes.

    NonnahswriterlolienMontresor_SP
  • elminsterelminster Member, Developer Posts: 15,958
    edited July 2015
    More IWD tomato quotes


    First, I cursed the Vale and the spirits of the tomatos within it. I bid them to rise and haunt the land. Next, I insinuated myself into Kuldahar society and became a barmaid at the local tavern. From there, I began to spread rumors of tomato brewing within the Vale and the danger it posed to all. It was only a matter of time until someone was sent to deal with the situation. It happened to be you.

    Hold your insults, fool! You have no concept of whom you are dealing with. When I cast my curse I felt a calling, a force that I had never felt before. It engulfed me, fueled my tomato, and brought it into being! It had to be the will of the goddess herself made manifest in me. I was chosen to tomato this great work!

    Post edited by elminster on
    lolienJuliusBorisovMontresor_SPBelgarathMTH
  • NimranNimran Member Posts: 4,848
    edited November 2014
    Some of my last ones were already done, I see. *casts Facepalm Self*
    Why does a tomato have arms and legs, but cannot walk or hold things?

    NonnahswriterlolienJuliusBorisovMontresor_SP
  • wubblewubble Member Posts: 3,156
    we're no strangers to tomatoes
    You know the Tomatoes and so do i
    A full tomato's what i'm thinking of
    you wouldn't get this from any other guy

    lolienJuliusBorisovMontresor_SP
  • dreamriderdreamrider Member Posts: 417
    edited November 2014
    Lore: How to tell if a given tomato will make a big splat, or a big FLAMING Splat.

    (This can also be accomplished with the Identify spell, or a seed catalog.)

    lolienJuliusBorisovMontresor_SPSoren_The_Wild
  • JuliusBorisovJuliusBorisov Member, Administrator, Moderator, Developer Posts: 19,422
    Tomato Juice is something they've been working on for quite a while now. As always, their plans have grown over time into something much larger than originally planned. They've also shifted the production timing around multiple times for a variety of reasons. The new tomato is in full production and is going well. They're stretching the capabilities of the tomato and adding new spices you just haven't seen before. They are really looking forward to shipping the tomato out and seeing the reactions of their customers.

    lolien
  • NimranNimran Member Posts: 4,848
  • Montresor_SPMontresor_SP Member Posts: 2,115
    Sorry, couldn't help it!

    image

    wubbleJuliusBorisovNonnahswriterlolien
  • WithinAmnesiaWithinAmnesia Member Posts: 921
    edited May 2015
    "Oh my tomatoes I'm glad have found you.

    Listen carefully if we ever become separated it is imperative that you make your way to the tomatoes. There you will meet Tomate-o and Tomat-o. They have long been my friends and you can trust them.

    Let's hurry tomatoes. The night can only get worse so we must find tomatoes soon. Don't worry, I will explain everything as soon as there is time.

    Wait, there is something wrong, we are in an ambush. Prepare your tomatoes.

    You're perceptive for an old man. You know why I am here. Hand over your Tomatoes and no one will be hurt. If you resist it shall be a waste of your life!"

    You're a Fool if you believe I would trust your Tomatoes. Step aside and you and your tomatoes will be unhurt.

    I'm sorry that you feel that way old man.

    Run Tomatoes get out of here!"

    "The Tomato is especially cruel this morning..."

    lolienMontresor_SPNonnahswriterJuliusBorisov
  • GrumGrum Member, Mobile Tester Posts: 2,099
    "Oh, it’s the old the-tomato-is-really-the-assassin-trick, is it? I should have seen that one coming. Cousin Belar once pulled that on my great Uncle Tookar, although to be fair he didn’t actually mean to kill anyone. He turned from a tomato into his original form just as a practical joke on my uncle’s birthday… and startled the old gnome so much he went and had a heart attack on the spot. The elders were so upset they turned Belar into a tomato for good. He liked it, though, and rolled off (that branch of the family was always a bit odd in the head, if you catch my meaning)… only to get eaten by a griffon a week later, I hear. Now, that’s justice if there ever was, I suppose."


    "I've had dangerous dealings with a wizard or two, myself. In fact, Golodon the Unmanned had the most dangerous breath this side of Rashemen. A casual conversation between him and Rozar the Unwilling almost started the Guild War of '42, you know. All those spells he cast, thinking he was cursed, and all he really needed was a good dentist. Of course, you show me a dentist whose willing to yank a rotten tomato out of the mouth of a cranky wizard and I'll show you a pig with wings. Big ones. They have them in the Moonshaes, you know. But enough about me."

    WithinAmnesialolienJuliusBorisov
  • WithinAmnesiaWithinAmnesia Member Posts: 921
    Where did you pull those altered quotes I mean tomatoes from @Grum?

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