Let's write some Limericks! (Attention, might get raunchy)
Buttercheese
Member Posts: 3,766
The rules:
- Everyone get's to just make one post in a row.
- Finish the Limerick the other person started and then post the first line of the next.
- Don't end on non-rhymable words.
Doesn't have to be Baldur's Gate/ D&D related, but it's encouraged
Example, using a limerick by @swnmcmlxi, found on the NPC Limericks thread:
Post 1:
That Dorn, he had manners quite coarse,
Post 2:
But was truly equipped like a horse.
Said: 'I don't dual wield,
And forget sword and shield -
Two-handed is a matter of course.'
Next: [Insert new first line here]
I'll start:
A bard once broke his lute
- Everyone get's to just make one post in a row.
- Finish the Limerick the other person started and then post the first line of the next.
- Don't end on non-rhymable words.
Doesn't have to be Baldur's Gate/ D&D related, but it's encouraged
Example, using a limerick by @swnmcmlxi, found on the NPC Limericks thread:
Post 1:
That Dorn, he had manners quite coarse,
Post 2:
But was truly equipped like a horse.
Said: 'I don't dual wield,
And forget sword and shield -
Two-handed is a matter of course.'
Next: [Insert new first line here]
I'll start:
A bard once broke his lute
Post edited by Buttercheese on
4
Comments
Bard's hopes were to dilute.
New rules: One posts the first line of a Limerick and the next person has to write the remaining four. Then they post the first line of the next poem. Let's try:
Making good forum games can be hard
Now we know SoD release date-ish
That was my nerdiest wish
Finally, I'll be playing improved bard.
There was a lich named Bill
So he bought a fast car,
And felt like a star,
With a girlfriend to keep off the chill.
When the Zhentarim learned how to ski
They didn't get far
got caught by Xzar
and Montaron gut them with glee.
What a hobbit is really craving
"Shave a leg", Gandalf greeted
Hobbit got Sauron defeated
That dude was seriously misbehaving.
I was on a search in planar sphere
Last words I said
before everyone bled
as the golem had hurt us severe.
Thayans are red, Abazigal's blue
Eclipse is event of sunlight lack
Ultimately everything goes to black
when the wire is disconnected by Boo.
A wizard once was forging a spell
So he gave up his books
Threw in with some crooks
And now he tells people, "I'm thwell."
====
The dragon was tending his hoard...
They thought he was beat,
'Til he turned on the heat.
And dined on hero smorgasbord.
=======
A halfling jumped up on his stool...
As he reached for the lass
he fell down on'is ass
The bugger slipped on his own drool
Eeh.. I'm obviously not so good at this, haha! But it's a great idea for a thread, and I laughed out loud on the above limericks.
___________________________________________
There once was a man named Noober
It proved quite the hurdle
'til he found a cursed girdle
and now our man Noober's a cougar!
There once were some Shadows in Amn...
They got in a dispute
over merits of glutes
but agreed that this lass was the bomb.
There once was a man named Jon
Who wanted his life everlong
He was true evil's choice
With a cool British voice
Too bad he'd the face of a prawn.
=========
The lass Imoen wanted some magic
She grew to bold
ended up in Spellhold
Now she's the plaything of fanatics.
In a town where winter never comes
I knew I fell in love in a banshee
It was awesome when she went to kiss me
We were conducting a war with tongues.
Once I lost my precious bag of holding
his name was Weenog,
as Orrick's watchdog
he performs well, till our party comes.
Edit: ninjaed by @brus .
An ogre gave boozes...
There's no excuses
For leaving it i must myself scolding.
Myconids are pretty creatures
Edit: Oh sorry for double posting.
But their spores are their most lovely features
If you drink them in tea
Pretty colors you'll see
But you'll be soundly condemned by the preachers
===========
There's a Drow who swings two pretty blades
And began
To fight; The Drow was quickly murdered.
The command
Was to stop dark elven raids.
===========
Viconia from the House DeVir was glad
To excel at his trade, he tried hard
His voice was quite sweet,
He was light on his feet.
It's a pity his verse never rhymed.
A little too raunchy, I'm afraid. Keep it PG-13, folks. --Dee
[/spoiler]
Alora was a right sneaky girl
who wears a rabbit foot charm instead of pearl.
She's a halfling, thief of course,
She could steal your pocket with no remorse.
Push and twist her dagger in hurl.
A limerick just came to me, so I'll post it outside the writing game.
A man had awakened in nightmare undone.
Hastily, his vitality was shun.
Instead of soul, he found talking skull
Suddenly his "life" became less dull.
You know it's not a Hamlet but the Nameless one.
Next one:
Once, I asked a succubus for a date
so for once I wouldn't have to m...
Hm.
Actually, I'll start over.
Once, I asked a succubus for a date
to prove to my family I'm straight.
Coney Island's a joke;
I ended up broke
To pay for all the wieners she ate.
Next up:
My first secret crush was a mage
He studied his books
But had not good looks
So in the end I just turned the page.
Xan the Enchanter is wise...
A true joy transplanter in guise
He transplants my heart
Steals it with his art
His moonblade is just the right sizeHis romance brings tears to my eyes.
Jenkal is a merry fellow
With kobolds he's really quite mellow
But he doesn't like you
No matter what you may do
He fights when you say to him, "Hello"
Mr Glint is a wily young gnome
Who ventures afar from his home.
He's seen by a gnoll
Who says "Oh, how droll!
So smutty, doing that with my comb."
There was a as wizard named Xan