@ThacoBell: A sad turn of events, when mental and physical health drag each other down. I wish your wife a good mental recovery (and physical as well, of course).
I'm quarantined. Great.
10 days ago I had a negative test (just routine, because of treating a positive patient while wearing full tack), and now I've probably just caught a cold, but rules are rules, and I can't even go for a walk, and they told me to come to the test center on Friday. Now I'm trying to reach the responsible guy at my hospital to see if he can test me earlier, because I won't be able to do my 24h shift on Sunday if I don't have a test result.
At least my children are allowed to go to school (wearing masks in class in my part of the country anyway), as long as I don't get a positive result.
And our most recent Covid-19 patient has died on the respirator a week after transporting him to the University Hospital. I had talked him through the hours when his breathing got worse and finally intubated him. He was so scared and I did my best to calm him down and give him hope, and now he's dead and I feel like a liar, and hate that I didn't insist on letting him talk to his wife before intubation. His wife was quarantined at home and therefore couldn't bring a mobile phone for him to use, and we aren't allowed to use our hospital phones on isolation wards. Still, I feel that I should have tried harder.
Also, you can't scare a person fearing for their lives even more, but I still feel bad about it, like I gave him false hope.
ARGH.
Got tested on Thursday and still haven't got my results.
I still think it's just an ugly cold, but I feel too sick for any kind of physical effort and I'm not allowed to go outside anyway... that's driving me mad. I never feel my ADHD more than when I'm actually forced to stay put.
And what bothers me is that people who deliberately went on a holiday in a risk area get tested right away at the airport, and I as hospital staff have to wait for days.
Me, my wife and the kids are being tested tomorrow. Considering I work in direct contact with the public it's a real possibility we have COVID. We all have symptoms that could be a flu or COVID including pain and exhaustion.
Me, my wife and the kids are being tested tomorrow. Considering I work in direct contact with the public it's a real possibility we have COVID. We all have symptoms that could be a flu or COVID including pain and exhaustion.
Just back from the lab. The kids were surprisingly quiet for the exam. I will receive the results Thursday. I still think it's just good old flu + allergies acting up.
Wars are useless, violence in general is useless. It baffles me all the young people who are voluntary to go to war and die for some old guys to keep their power.
Kinda bummed because I got scolded for a post I made online on a post asking for advice. A different person (not the one who asked for advice) complained that I was talking about myself.
The original poster asked for people to tell us their personal experiences with the problem. Half the responders talked about their own experiences with it, just like me, but I was the only one who got criticized for it. I'm pretty sure it's because I was the only responder who mentioned I was trans--it was the only difference between my post and the rest of them.
I worked really hard writing that post. I wanted to help the OP; he seemed like a nice guy who was trying to help someone he cared about and I wanted to support him.
It's just a bunch of little things. I see someone post a list of arguments against being LGBT and demanding a justification for my existence and I can't stop my brain from writing up a list of counterarguments even though I know the person is just a troll who wants to irritate people. Individually, they're minor annoyances, but they happen constantly. It's a near-daily reminder that I'm outnumbered 99 to 1.
It just gets exhausting. I wish my gender wasn't a big political controversy.
Kinda bummed because I got scolded for a post I made online on a post asking for advice. A different person (not the one who asked for advice) complained that I was talking about myself.
The original poster asked for people to tell us their personal experiences with the problem. Half the responders talked about their own experiences with it, just like me, but I was the only one who got criticized for it. I'm pretty sure it's because I was the only responder who mentioned I was trans--it was the only difference between my post and the rest of them.
I worked really hard writing that post. I wanted to help the OP; he seemed like a nice guy who was trying to help someone he cared about and I wanted to support him.
It's just a bunch of little things. I see someone post a list of arguments against being LGBT and demanding a justification for my existence and I can't stop my brain from writing up a list of counterarguments even though I know the person is just a troll who wants to irritate people. Individually, they're minor annoyances, but they happen constantly. It's a near-daily reminder that I'm outnumbered 99 to 1.
It just gets exhausting. I wish my gender wasn't a big political controversy.
Just out of curiosity, why did you mention your gender? When dealing with cyber-space I find that the less information you reveal about yourself the better. Unless there's a specific reason it might be relevant, I never mention my age, race, socio-economic status, nationality, gender or religion. People on this forum probably know quite a few of those details about me by now, but this forum is a safe niche to frequent...
@Balrog99: There was a specific reason it was relevant, actually. A guy was asking for advice on how to help his girlfriend with her body dysmorphia and make her feel comfortable in her own body. He was asking other women how they dealt with it, or how their partners could have helped them with it. My girlfriend and I both have issues with our bodies because of gender dysphoria, so I told him how we dealt with it and supported each other.
The moment when you realize that next gen console games will be costing outrageous €80 (= US$ 94.60). Nopenopenopenopenopenopenopenopenopenopenopenopenope~
Say high to my pops car it is completely totalled, so while it was sitting in my aunties yard, some guy from what I was hearing drove off the highway, over a parking lot, and into his car full speed, totalling it. This was August 8th.... The same month the cares act ended for my state...
The same month which just so happen to also be the month mom went back into the hospital due to high blood sugar... The same month the semester began and money had to get scrapped together just for that... Still don't effing get how I'm paying the literal same amount amount even though we had to switch to only and I'm using none of the college facilities...
The same month rent was missed for the first time throughout this whole over freaking extended lockdown and I have to have two months worth of rent paid by today or I'm evicted.
Also, the joys of waking up at 4am wondering why you're on the ground, just to get up and reinflate you air bed, just to wake up again and question why you're on the ground again... Then grow really tired of life when you realize theirs a hole out of nowhere....ON THE TOPSIDE OF THE THING! Like seriously do I become wolverine when I sleep or something.
Of the past 30 years of my life is a example of what my future is going to be like, I don't think I can keep doing this for another 30 years. I don't know how pops made it to 60
A friend of mine is self-harming. She showed me a picture of the cuts on her leg. I'm trying to get her some help.
Sometimes it is hard to get past that. It is a very convoluted thing and it is not always from one source and rarely from one you might imagine. It is mostly a feeling of disconnect, you can't get past it and feel that you are not real. Everyone else seems to be living life but you can't and you don't know why and can't handle who you are and the life you have. It is a need deep down to feel... anything. Hope that you can get her some help.
A friend of mine is self-harming. She showed me a picture of the cuts on her leg. I'm trying to get her some help.
At least it means she's ready to ask for help, which is good. But, as @_Nightfall_ said, such things tend to be complicated, and they tend to get worse. I have friends who did that for years before they told anyone, and by then it had become a kind of pressure relief for many things, and it was very hard to even find out what had originally caused it.
I hope she finds a competent and understanding professional.
What's worse...
Tossing and turning at one in the morning trying to sleep but can't.
Feeling like you're alone at the end of the day. You look in every direction but there's no one standing next to you.
Neither, what's worse is is being awake at one in the morning trying to sleep, trying to silence the voices in your head that keep re-affirming that feeling that you are alone. So you turn to your phone and start looking at your contacts hoping for a voice or a escape needed to crush this feeling.
But who do you reach out to?
Your brother? No he has his own problems... There's no point in being a burden on him.
Mother/Father? They worry enough as it is... I can't add to it, i won't add more to it.
Your ex? Yeah, and a duck will lay a golden egg. She already knows how you are and how you can get sometimes. She hasn't carried to reach out to see how you are once since breaking up, no point in pretending she would care now.
Random names and numbers, some you haven't shared a word with in months, others in literal years?
Can't escape it while awake and can't even run away into my dreams.
What's worse...
Tossing and turning at one in the morning trying to sleep but can't.
Feeling like you're alone at the end of the day. You look in every direction but there's no one standing next to you.
Neither, what's worse is is being awake at one in the morning trying to sleep, trying to silence the voices in your head that keep re-affirming that feeling that you are alone. So you turn to your phone and start looking at your contacts hoping for a voice or a escape needed to crush this feeling.
But who do you reach out to?
Your brother? No he has his own problems... There's no point in being a burden on him.
Mother/Father? They worry enough as it is... I can't add to it, i won't add more to it.
Your ex? Yeah, and a duck will lay a golden egg. She already knows how you are and how you can get sometimes. She hasn't carried to reach out to see how you are once since breaking up, no point in pretending she would care now.
Random names and numbers, some you haven't shared a word with in months, others in literal years?
Can't escape it while awake and can't even run away into my dreams.
Yourself dude. Nobody cares about your fate as much as you do. What do you want out of life? What's preventing you from achieving it? Is it you, somebody else, or are you pursuing something that's not within your skill set and banging your head against the wall with no hope of success? Only you can answer those questions...
Joining the ranks of people needing to get tested. Hit me suddenly and pretty hard. Guess I'm going nowhere for awhile.
If you DO end up positive, watch carefully for symptoms. If symptoms persist for a week and a half, be prepared for an emergency. Its about the 2 week mark of symptoms where things get bad on average. Ask your doctor for a rescue inhaler, even if you don't have asthma, it helps. Taking it twice a day can reduce symptoms of breathing difficulty.
Odds are, even if you test positive, you won't have to worry about worst case scenario. Might not even ever have symptoms.
Been dealing with a lot of depression and sleeplessness recently. My medication is only working so/so and I'm not really sure how to get things to improve.
Been dealing with a lot of depression and sleeplessness recently. My medication is only working so/so and I'm not really sure how to get things to improve.
Sign o' the times bro'. My sleep has been chaotic at best since April. I'm not prone to depression myself, normally, but this hasn't been a normal year. Been struggling myself off and on. Hang in there, you're not alone...
Today didn't start well. I obviously had an outdated version of our work schedule on my phone. I was eating breakfast with my family, ready to take them to see my parents, go for a walk there and have lunch together (before it would eventually become irresponsible again in the near future), when my employer's secretary called and asked where I was.
I was completely shocked and deeply embarrassed, dropped everything and went to work immediately. They had changed my day off (from 24h duty) from Wednesday to Friday and I hadn't noticed. So, my employer was upset with me, my family was sad that they went alone, I feel like a complete idiot for this to have happened and am very sad to have missed the opportunity of visiting my parents together with my family.
But at least I saw them a month ago for a short time. We haven't seen the Romanian part of the family for over a year, and who knows when it will be possible again.
Just got the phonecall from my mom 2 hours ago... Her liver is failing and a transplant will cost 400,000 usd.
I have very little light left in this world and now the brightest of it is starting the flicker.
So sorry to hear that @DragonKing .
Can you go see her or is traveling restricted?
No, I was planning before I found out about this not to go home this thanks giving to save money and go home for Christmas, but I don't know what I'm going to do now, I can't just go home.
Comments
10 days ago I had a negative test (just routine, because of treating a positive patient while wearing full tack), and now I've probably just caught a cold, but rules are rules, and I can't even go for a walk, and they told me to come to the test center on Friday. Now I'm trying to reach the responsible guy at my hospital to see if he can test me earlier, because I won't be able to do my 24h shift on Sunday if I don't have a test result.
At least my children are allowed to go to school (wearing masks in class in my part of the country anyway), as long as I don't get a positive result.
And our most recent Covid-19 patient has died on the respirator a week after transporting him to the University Hospital. I had talked him through the hours when his breathing got worse and finally intubated him. He was so scared and I did my best to calm him down and give him hope, and now he's dead and I feel like a liar, and hate that I didn't insist on letting him talk to his wife before intubation. His wife was quarantined at home and therefore couldn't bring a mobile phone for him to use, and we aren't allowed to use our hospital phones on isolation wards. Still, I feel that I should have tried harder.
Also, you can't scare a person fearing for their lives even more, but I still feel bad about it, like I gave him false hope.
Got tested on Thursday and still haven't got my results.
I still think it's just an ugly cold, but I feel too sick for any kind of physical effort and I'm not allowed to go outside anyway... that's driving me mad. I never feel my ADHD more than when I'm actually forced to stay put.
And what bothers me is that people who deliberately went on a holiday in a risk area get tested right away at the airport, and I as hospital staff have to wait for days.
Damn, that sucks! Good luck my friend...
It's just so pointless. People don't need to kill each other.
The original poster asked for people to tell us their personal experiences with the problem. Half the responders talked about their own experiences with it, just like me, but I was the only one who got criticized for it. I'm pretty sure it's because I was the only responder who mentioned I was trans--it was the only difference between my post and the rest of them.
I worked really hard writing that post. I wanted to help the OP; he seemed like a nice guy who was trying to help someone he cared about and I wanted to support him.
It's just a bunch of little things. I see someone post a list of arguments against being LGBT and demanding a justification for my existence and I can't stop my brain from writing up a list of counterarguments even though I know the person is just a troll who wants to irritate people. Individually, they're minor annoyances, but they happen constantly. It's a near-daily reminder that I'm outnumbered 99 to 1.
It just gets exhausting. I wish my gender wasn't a big political controversy.
Just out of curiosity, why did you mention your gender? When dealing with cyber-space I find that the less information you reveal about yourself the better. Unless there's a specific reason it might be relevant, I never mention my age, race, socio-economic status, nationality, gender or religion. People on this forum probably know quite a few of those details about me by now, but this forum is a safe niche to frequent...
The moment when you realize that next gen console games will be costing outrageous €80 (= US$ 94.60).
Nopenopenopenopenopenopenopenopenopenopenopenopenope~
Say high to my pops car it is completely totalled, so while it was sitting in my aunties yard, some guy from what I was hearing drove off the highway, over a parking lot, and into his car full speed, totalling it. This was August 8th.... The same month the cares act ended for my state...
The same month which just so happen to also be the month mom went back into the hospital due to high blood sugar... The same month the semester began and money had to get scrapped together just for that... Still don't effing get how I'm paying the literal same amount amount even though we had to switch to only and I'm using none of the college facilities...
The same month rent was missed for the first time throughout this whole over freaking extended lockdown and I have to have two months worth of rent paid by today or I'm evicted.
Also, the joys of waking up at 4am wondering why you're on the ground, just to get up and reinflate you air bed, just to wake up again and question why you're on the ground again... Then grow really tired of life when you realize theirs a hole out of nowhere....ON THE TOPSIDE OF THE THING! Like seriously do I become wolverine when I sleep or something.
Of the past 30 years of my life is a example of what my future is going to be like, I don't think I can keep doing this for another 30 years. I don't know how pops made it to 60
Sometimes it is hard to get past that. It is a very convoluted thing and it is not always from one source and rarely from one you might imagine. It is mostly a feeling of disconnect, you can't get past it and feel that you are not real. Everyone else seems to be living life but you can't and you don't know why and can't handle who you are and the life you have. It is a need deep down to feel... anything. Hope that you can get her some help.
At least it means she's ready to ask for help, which is good. But, as @_Nightfall_ said, such things tend to be complicated, and they tend to get worse. I have friends who did that for years before they told anyone, and by then it had become a kind of pressure relief for many things, and it was very hard to even find out what had originally caused it.
I hope she finds a competent and understanding professional.
Tossing and turning at one in the morning trying to sleep but can't.
Feeling like you're alone at the end of the day. You look in every direction but there's no one standing next to you.
Neither, what's worse is is being awake at one in the morning trying to sleep, trying to silence the voices in your head that keep re-affirming that feeling that you are alone. So you turn to your phone and start looking at your contacts hoping for a voice or a escape needed to crush this feeling.
But who do you reach out to?
Your brother? No he has his own problems... There's no point in being a burden on him.
Mother/Father? They worry enough as it is... I can't add to it, i won't add more to it.
Your ex? Yeah, and a duck will lay a golden egg. She already knows how you are and how you can get sometimes. She hasn't carried to reach out to see how you are once since breaking up, no point in pretending she would care now.
Random names and numbers, some you haven't shared a word with in months, others in literal years?
Can't escape it while awake and can't even run away into my dreams.
Yourself dude. Nobody cares about your fate as much as you do. What do you want out of life? What's preventing you from achieving it? Is it you, somebody else, or are you pursuing something that's not within your skill set and banging your head against the wall with no hope of success? Only you can answer those questions...
Good luck I hope you get well soon.
If you DO end up positive, watch carefully for symptoms. If symptoms persist for a week and a half, be prepared for an emergency. Its about the 2 week mark of symptoms where things get bad on average. Ask your doctor for a rescue inhaler, even if you don't have asthma, it helps. Taking it twice a day can reduce symptoms of breathing difficulty.
Odds are, even if you test positive, you won't have to worry about worst case scenario. Might not even ever have symptoms.
Sign o' the times bro'. My sleep has been chaotic at best since April. I'm not prone to depression myself, normally, but this hasn't been a normal year. Been struggling myself off and on. Hang in there, you're not alone...
I was completely shocked and deeply embarrassed, dropped everything and went to work immediately. They had changed my day off (from 24h duty) from Wednesday to Friday and I hadn't noticed. So, my employer was upset with me, my family was sad that they went alone, I feel like a complete idiot for this to have happened and am very sad to have missed the opportunity of visiting my parents together with my family.
But at least I saw them a month ago for a short time. We haven't seen the Romanian part of the family for over a year, and who knows when it will be possible again.
I have very little light left in this world and now the brightest of it is starting the flicker.
So sorry to hear that @DragonKing .
Can you go see her or is traveling restricted?
No, I was planning before I found out about this not to go home this thanks giving to save money and go home for Christmas, but I don't know what I'm going to do now, I can't just go home.